What I mean by the title is you have control of your thoughts, mindset and actions. We tend to forget this or not be aware of it, but this is important to know for your well being and peace of mind. There are things out of our control, feelings, emotions, the environment, others, the world/universe. We shouldn’t focus our energy trying to change those things, or pushing them away. Focus on your thoughts and actions, what are they doing for you, are they helping you, can things be changed to benefit you. That should be your focus. Your thoughts and actions make you who you are. Just remember you are in control of that. I hope you all try to make the best of the week. Do what you can to bring joy, happiness and peace to your life.
We will not always feel positive emotions. Feelings of happiness, joyfulness, productivity, energy, creativity, inspiration are great, but you will not always have these feelings. You will feel unmotivated, lethargic, uncreative, sad, melancholic, unproductive etc,. We don’t enjoy these feelings so much. We should learn to embrace all the emotions that arise in us. They are part of us. They are part of living. We should remember to be kind to ourselves when we feel this way. You shouldn’t feel guilt or shame for having these very normal feelings.Try not to force yourself out of these emotions. It just ends up making you feel worse. Try to let the emotions ride through. They are there for a reason. We shouldn’t deny what is there. Take it in and learn from it.
Right now my creativity and motivation is at a low. My mind must be exhausted from all the creative energy I had a couple weeks ago. My mind needs rest. I accept my emotions for what it is right now. Now I still push myself to do some things, nothing too much, but something small, so that I don’t feel useless or lazy. Even during these times, it is important to still work on your well-being. It doesn’t have to be anything grand, small things are better than nothing. During these times I still try to be a bit productive for the well being of my mind and body. I just try not to push myself too hard. It is okay to rest and relax. Creativity and motivation come and go. All emotions come and go. Awareness of that can go along way with coping with emotions that may create discomfort.
Doing some self- reflection can help you resolve your emotions. I try to journal my thoughts and feelings. It usually helps me come to an understanding, which makes it easier to accept, or maybe at the moment there isn’t an answer, and you just go with it. Answers aren’t always there. Being able to cope with all the highs and lows of your emotions can help build strength and peace of mind.
We should remind ourselves we are human. We will not always be at 100%. We will not always be productive, motivated, inspired, happy etc,. There will be times you don’t want to do anything, but do mindless things. Maybe that is your mind and body telling you to relax and calm down.You should listen to it. There is nothing wrong with some down time. This can be a problem if it is persistent, and last months, and hinders your self-growth/well-being, but every once in awhile it is totally normal to feel these emotions. We all need a break at times.
Our emotions are like waves or a rollercoaster. They go up and down, it may spins us around. They take us for a ride. We just got to remember to just flow with it. And you will be able to get through it smoothly and peacefully. Resistance, guilt, shaming are not the answers. You can always grow and learn from the lows, build from it. As I always say, enjoy the highs and embrace the lows. Take it all in. Some say, if you are not able to embrace the lows. You will not be able to appreciate the highs, and I agree. If you can’t appreciate the highs, what is life really?
Just here to send you a reminder that when it comes to your influences, daily habits and decisions. It is up to you what you will do with those things. I like to remind you that you are in control of those aspects of your life. Others can’t make decisions for you. Others cant make you do things you don’t want to. It may be easier to blame the world and others, but it doesn’t help solve anything. Others and the world may make things difficult at times, but in the end it is up to you how you handle those situations. Things aren’t hopeless. You can make things happen. You can make changes.
Give yourself the power. Give yourself strength. If you make good decisions. You can pat yourself on the back and be proud. If not, you can accept the mistake(no self-blaming), learn and keep moving. No one is perfect. It will happen. At least the mistake came from you and not others influences. I just want to remind you that no one has power over you, unless you allow them. Building a healthy mindset and foundation. Also self-love and acceptance can help you become aware of your power, and give you the ability to use it wisely.
If it is being creative, or being productive, if it is focusing on your mental and physical health. Watching and reading inspirational things, or watching and reading things that make you think. Just think, is the thing I am doing benefiting me in any way. If it is, keep doing it, if it is not, try to step away.
SNS may fill a void and be distracting, but it doesn’t fill it for long, and may make things worse. The void won’t be fulfilled by distractions. It can most likely be filled by silence, creativity and knowledge. I realize how much time is wasted on scrolling.
Recently I have been focusing my energy on things that can help me evolve and learn. What can I gain from this experience? How can I grow? What can I learn? How does this benefit me? Are the questions I ask myself when it pertains to the things I do.
I have been looking into clean eating recently. I am always looking into eating better. I also watched a couple of minimalism videos, and other self-growth videos to make me think and figure out ways to live better and have a more fulfilling life. I have also been looking at some others videos about things in general to get me thinking and gain new knowledge about the world. I also continue to find time to write things for my book.
Although, I do scroll occasionally(it is not as interesting anymore now that I stepped away from it more often). And I do love my kpop. These things don’t pervade my life as much anymore, due to my awareness of how wasteful it can be. These things don’t enable my self-growth. They can be enjoyable, but should only be indulged every so often. There may be things in your life that may be stalling your growth and development. Whatever it is. Finding ways to put your energy away from those things and on to things that can help you grow is key. This is the only way to get to where you want to be, or get the things you want in life.
Creativity, positivity, knowledge and inspiration have been flowing through me the past two weeks. And this is due to my more mindful approach to life, and making more use of my time that benefits my self-growth. There is so much, we as individuals, can learn from out there. There is so much we can do. Putting effort into these things is what makes or breaks us. Falling into distractions is easy, and we will continue to fall into them from time to time. We just got to learn to do it less often. I definitely do, and will continue to strive to do things that aid my self-growth, and reach my goals.
Constructive criticism is the process of offering valid and well-reasoned opinions about the work of others, usually involving both positive and negative comments, in a friendly manner rather than an oppositional one.
It is hard for many to receive any type of criticism. Our ego makes it hard for us to receive it well. It can be hurtful, it stings. The thing is we need to learn to take a more mindful approach when dealing with Constructive criticism. This type of criticism isn’t there to harm you, but it is there to help one improve. We tend not to think of it that way though.
We associate constructive criticism with that person is attacking me, or that person is after me, or that person is picking on me. You may get offended. Have your pride a bit hurt. You may think ‘I am good at what I do, how can they criticize my work?’ The ego makes it all about me. Although we may see our faults and call them out. We definitely don’t like when others point out any faults, or mistakes of ours.
The thing about constructive criticism is that it is used to help you improve, and work more efficiently. The person giving constructive criticism could be doing this to makes things work more efficiently. To help make things become easier for other workers, and to make the customers happy. It may be hurtful, but we as individuals must remember that it isn’t all about you. No one is perfect. No one knows everything. You will make mistakes. You will not do everything right. Learning not to take this type of criticism personally takes getting to understand you are not perfect, and not always right, and being aware of our ego and how powerful it can be.
When it comes to work. There is always something bigger than yourself. You must expect criticism, even if you consider yourself a good worker. It doesn’t change the fact that you could make mistakes, or do things that may not be in the best interest of other workers, the company, or your customers. As we are not perfect beings. There is always something one can improve upon. It may hurt your pride/ego, but it is better to learn and grow, than to keep making the same mistakes repeatedly. I mean we all want to become the best we can be at what we do right? It all part of growing, evolving and learning.
You can only improve from constructive criticism and guidance. Well, that is if you are able to handle it in a mindful manner. You can also turn it against you, and become negative, angry, upset, bitter etc,. Remember that in the end, that just hurts you. Use that criticism as fuel to become better. Don’t use it to destroy your inner peace and progress.
Perfection is unattainable. We can only keep improving and working on ourselves. I know I am a good worker, but I know there are things I can improve upon. I have made mistakes at my work, and have been called out on it. I didn’t take it personally. I just took in their constructive criticism, listened to what they had they say, which made sense. I didn’t push back. I didn’t attack. I didn’t become reactive. I listened and gained new knowledge of things I can do better. I have learned to take it in and not take it personally. It is not about me. It is about getting things done in a more efficient way for the customers.
You may think doing things your way is the best option. The thing is the ego likes us to think our way is the right way. Sometimes you got to step back, and learn to be open minded to others opinions and advice. It may turn out their way is more efficient, or they may have some helpful advice. Some may have more experience, so they may know more than you do. There are a couple of times I thought one way was a good way, but then was taught another way that was more efficient. There is nothing wrong with learning and owning up to your mistakes. It can be hard. It can hurt your pride, but what is better, keeping your ego/pride intact, or growing and learning as an individual?
Now there can be some criticism that can be hurtful for an individual. Criticism that isn’t helpful in anyway, but is just plain hurtful is the wrong type of criticism you should not take. We should remember to tell the difference. Constructive criticism is there to help and guide you. It is there to help you improve, grow and learn. Regular criticism usually comes from a negative place, from a negative individual. Remember that type of criticism is a reflection of them, not you. It is best to ignore this type of criticism. There is no place for negative people, and their criticism in your life. Try not to allow them to pull you down with them.
Constructive criticism is good for us. The ego makes it hard for us to accept it. We must learn to break away from the ego. Be mindful and learn to take on constructive criticism to help improve. In the end, you want to do your best. You can’t do that by ignoring mistakes and flaws in your work. Remember, there is nothing to learn from perfection, and wouldn’t life be boring if there was nothing to learn?
I had a topic in mind this week, but I like to talk about a personal experience of mind. I tend to find inspiration to share my experiences of my mindful practices. I am always gaining some new enlightenment or reminders through my practices. With practicing mindfulness for a couple of years now. My ability to adapt to change in plans, or disappointment has improved.
I usually spend my weekends taking walks in the morning, but this Saturday the weather wasn’t particularly the best for walking. It was rainy and stormy. I was a bit disappointed I couldn’t go for a walk. It is really refreshing to take my walks in the morning, but as I realize plans don’t always go the way you want, weather is unpredictable, life is unpredictable.
I didn’t want to wallow in disappointment and let it defeat and consume me. I decided to use this negative emotion in a positive way. I wanted to use this rainy day to do some writing I have been holding off for a year now. I have been thinking about writing a book, but never really got to it. I decided to use this extra time at home to work on it. I am most creative and motivated in the morning, so this was my chance to work on it. I was happy to get a couple of things done. It was really rewarding to start it. I didn’t do much, but every little step towards your goal helps. I always think it is best to do thing little by little, instead of overwhelming yourself to get as much done. It puts a lot of pressure on oneself.
I was proud of myself that I was able to do something productive and positive with my extra time home, instead of wasting it on being sad and disappointed. I started to appreciate the time I got to be home. This was my chance to relax. I am always moving with work, during the work week. This rainy day was my opportunity to relax my body. Although, I have become aware of it. I like to be reminded that change can be a wonderful experience if you learn to focus your energy on the positives of it, and make use of it.
I also found it relaxing and soothing to just sit there and listen to the sound of rain. It was quite nice. It made me appreciate rainy days like these. Sometimes we need days like these to find inspiration, be creative and relax our bodies. I was reminded Saturday that a day at home can be just as wonderful as a day exploring. It is all about perspective.
I always enjoy reading my mindful day book, before heading off to work. I thought this message was perfect for these times. It is easy to get caught up in the negativity storm out there. Just remember there is beauty out there. There are things to be positive about. Things may look grim now, but we can get through this with a calm and positive mind. It is easy to be filled with hate and anger, but change can only happen from a peaceful, calm and positive heart and mind. I know this is hard to practice, but try not to look into the worries of tomorrow. Try not to dwell on the sorrows of yesterday. Look into the wonders of today. You can only change what happens in the moment. The moment is your chance to grow, learn, challenge oneself, evolve, make change etc,. Struggles are lessons to overcome. Try to live each day as happily as one can. See the good, see the possibility, see the positivity. I know for some it is hard, I get it, I empathize. Just remember a negative mind and soul does nothing for your peace of mind and well-being. I wrote a bit more than I thought I would. I hope you all have a lovely weekend. Try to do something that invokes peace and happiness within yourself.
These days it can be hard to find the good in life. The media is consumed with negativity at the moment. This is why it is important to step away and take time to be mindful. I went for a lovely walk at a park. The scenery was beautiful. It made me see the beauty and good of this world. The Earth is quite beautiful if you really look at it. Moments like these bring peace, joy and happiness. Find those moments that bring you these things. Our state of mind is very important. We must remember to remain at peace, so we can continue to live the best way we can. I always find clarity, inspiration and meaning through my walks. Nature is truly a beautiful thing.
It is easy to fall into the trap of negativity these days, so much is going on that can cultivate negative feelings, emotions and behaviors. We must remember that we have to take care of our minds and bodies. A stressed or negative mind and body can’t solve anything or make a change. Taking care of your mental health is important. So being aware of what cultivates negativity and how it can be avoided is a good step towards a more content and peaceful life.
Negative thoughts, feelings and emotions are ubiquitous, but there are ways you can avoid having them rule your life. There are triggers that can cultivate a negative mindset and lifestyle. I wanted to list a couple of things that promote a negative mindset/lifestyle. The best thing for your well-being is to steer clear of these things as much as possible. I just want you to be aware of the things that create a negative world, so that you can figure out ways to avoid falling into this trap. You may not be able to control negativity all the time, but you can learn to alleviate these negative thoughts/behaviors/habits most of the time if one becomes more aware of these habits.
Ways that create negativity:
Judging looking down on others, talking about others, questioning others lifestyle. This mindset is not helpful for you at all. Focusing on oneself is most important.
Complaining Leads to no solution
Reactive behavior Being cut off in traffic, arguments, angry outburst ,annoyance, someone saying things you don’t like, or does things you don’t like. This can all make one react in a negative manner. It is best at times like these to step back and take breaths. These reactions can cause stress to the mind and body and raise one’s blood pressure, so it is best to avoid these reactions as much as you can.
Gossiping Wasting energy on others does nothing fulfilling or satisfying for oneself. This just promotes a judgmental mentality. Using your time to promote self-growth, learn, talk about insightful, in-depth topics.
Comparisons Looking at the positive of others and focusing on the negative of ourselves. People tend to focus on what we don’t have that others do. Try focusing on what you have that others may not have. No one is perfect. Comparisons can be problematic.
Victim mentality leads to no solution, one can’t improve or change with this mindset. Blaming others, circumstances, and the world takes the power away from you. I am not saying blame yourself, but one must remember that we have control of certain things in life. This mentality reduces that power. People with this mentality tend to feel helpless and the reality is that they are not.
Criticism This is towards oneself and others. It can lead or be a result of low confidence, or self-acceptance/love.
Controlling mindset The need to control others and the world around you is impossible and unrealistic. This can lead to a very stressed and angry individual. You can only control your thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Let the rest be.
News/SNS We all know these things can be triggers, especially these days.
Pessimistic mindset Ah yes, the half glass full mindset. Focusing on the bad, negative and wrongs of the world.
It is easy for humans to focus on the negatives. From an evolutionary standpoint it makes sense. It was needed to ward off any foreign dangers, predators, other tribes, dangerous foods/plants. It makes sense that our brains are wired to focus on the negatives, but these days most of our negative thoughts are not cultivated from dangerous situations. They are just perceived that way. This is why it is so much harder to be positive.
Negative thinking is hard to avoid, but we do have control of how we perceive things in life. There are ways to promote a healthier, more positive mindset. I know this is repetitive, as I mentioned these a lot before, but it is important to keep mentioning it, so that these habits become habitual to live life with a more peaceful and positive mindset.
Ways to avoid negativity:
Take breaths Just stop and take deep breaths. This can help calm your negative thoughts and emotions. I always feel a sense of calmness doing this.
Take mindful breaks This is always helpful for me when I am consumed with so much information and negativity from the online world. Just getting back to yourself can create such peace and happiness.
Write down negative thoughts I saw this somewhere online, during my research. I thought this approach was interesting. Visually seeing your negative thoughts can be powerful. Letting it out on paper and to the world. Can put the negativity away from you and to these words on paper.It helps release the negative energy within you. Seeing your thoughts on paper may motivate oneself to change your perspective. I may try this one in the future.
Meditate Always a helpful tool when stressed, feeling down, or when negative thoughts consume oneself.
Exercise Known to reduce stress and depression. Gives one a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.
Go outside/walk in nature Something that is very helpful for myself. I always get a sense of peace coming back from a walk.
Change your language Avoid can’t,won’t, never, always, life is bad, people are bad. Push away negative words and put more emphasis on positive ones.
Practice gratitude Appreciate what you have, what is good, the beauty of yourself, others and life.
Practice compassion Show love for oneself, others and the world can help promote a positive and healthier mindset.
Practice forgiveness This can release a lot of tension and weigh on your shoulders. It will be much easier to move on and find peace if one does this.
Do things that spark joy Taking walk in nature, reading, listening to music are all things that bring me joy and happiness. Find things that do that for you. Feeling of happiness and content will exceed the negative feelings and emotions.
Be creative/productive Gives one a lovely sense of accomplishment, satisfaction and peace of mind. Doing something for your self-growth is always satisfying and rewarding. It can also help boost your confidence and give oneself a sense of appreciation.
Helping others There is nothing more rewarding, than helping others in need. We all can do our part in helping others in any way we can. It doesn’t have to be big, any small gesture helps.
Take action These negative thoughts will consume your life if one does not decide to make a change. What exactly is creating this negative mindset? What can I do to change this and live a more positive lifestyle? It is important to take steps away from the negativity.
I will end this with some quotes on this topic. I hope you all learn to live each day more happily, positively and peacefully. I hope you all have a lovely week.
We find ourselves chasing happiness. Not realizing it is right in front of us. The only way to find true happiness is within ourselves. It is about acceptance, appreciation and gratitude of who we are and what we have.
Trying to find happiness through external sources(success, life dreams, money, objects) will just lead to stress, anger, frustration, jealousy among other negative emotions. You try to seek happiness, but end up seeking sadness instead, because expectations are trying to be met.
Happiness isn’t something to obtain. It is always there, just like all other emotions. You never seek sadness, but it finds its way to appear. Happiness can also appear once you find peace within yourself and life. You just have to learn to appreciate the things around you, and be content with how things are.
Happiness isn’t static. It shouldn’t be the main goal. Like all emotions, it comes and goes. There will be times you won’t be happy, and that is okay. Don’t beat yourself up for not being happy. It just ends up making you feel worse.
In the end, happiness isn’t something to seek, it is just there. You just have to learn how to allow it into your life. There is no need to search for it.Awareness, appreciation, satisfaction, understanding, acceptance, and positive thinking all can contribute to happiness.
Nordic nations seem to have the formula correct. They are consistently listed as the happiest countries. Why? Because of their satisfaction of the simple things in life. They aren’t the richest. They aren’t particularly career driven. They don’t seek money, and they aren’t materialistic. They just want to live their lives, enjoying the beauty and experiences of the world. They live life in a comfortable environment as freely as they can making connections with the people around them. It seems this is the right formula to ensure happiness. This can create a longer lasting happy mindset, rather than the short-term happiness from external sources.