Morning “Me” Time

This is a personal post about my experience this weekend. I decided not to go online at all in the morning this weekend. I tend to scroll mindlessly a lot on the weekends, so I decided to have a mindful, and me time in the mornings.

I really enjoyed doing this practice. It gives me the head space to clear my mind, and be creative. It just allows my thoughts to run free. It is like I am in my own space. I don’t think I am mindful enough sometimes, but when I do get into a mindful mode. I wonder why I don’t do it often.

It just felt good to be away from the computer, and focus on me. I did some writing. I meditated. I worked on my online course. I did some mindful exercises, which can be fun. My mom bought me a lovely mindfulness book, and it really helps you put things into perspective, and see things differently. I mindfully listened to some music. I did some journaling, cleaning, and exercising. This me time allowed me to think more about things, but in a very mindful manner. I just allowed my thoughts to flow freely. It is a really wonderful experience to give yourself space to be you, and work on you.

I felt a sense of peace, relaxation, and positivity from giving myself the space to be me. I wasn’t bombarded by others thoughts and negativity by going online. I was just giving my mind the space it needed for clarity and creativity, which is a very beautiful thing. I like to continue this practice daily, especially on the weekends when I have more time on my hands. I hope you all have a lovely mindful morning wherever you are.

Not sure if this quote really fits with what I am talking about, but it really spoke to me.

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Feeling Uninspired/Unmotivated

There are times I don’t particularly feel inspired, motivated, or productive. There are days I feel lazy and unproductive. There are times I just want to get lost in distractions. I am sure you have all had these moments. We just don’t always have the motivation spirit.

Lately I have been in a rut, not much in the mood to do much. The one thing you don’t want to do is get down on yourself for feeling this way. Try not to shame or guilt yourself. The one thing I learn from mindfulness practice is to accept all types of emotions and feelings, negative or positive. I know I won’t always be in a productive state of mind, and that is okay. We are not machines. We need some down time to relax.

Having some distraction time is fine, but things do need to get done. I may have to push myself harder to get the things I want done, because I know it will benefit me in the end to get it done. I may not be in much of a mood to write, or finish my online course, or find inspiration, but I know if I don’t take steps to do it. I would feel like crap for not doing it.

I try to focus my energy on the future implications, and how it will end up helping me if I do these things. That usually pushes me to be productive. I tell myself that it will only take an hour or less of my time, and I would feel much better after it is accomplished.  I always do feel better after doing the productive task.

It is easy to stay in a rut, and get down on yourself. When you have days like these. It is okay to practice self-kindness, and not shame, or guilt yourself for feeling this way, and not getting much done. It is all part of the human experience. We all have these days. It will happen. You just got to learn to push through it, and figure out your own way to get things done, even if it is little steps to get what you want done.

I am not in the mood to get things done lately, but I find a way to push myself to do it, because I know my mind and body will appreciate it. I know it can help make my future brighter and more satisfactory. I know I won’t feel good about my day if I don’t get at least one thing done.

I am not necessarily in the mood to find inspiration, but when I am able to push myself to read, or watch something inspirational. It finds a way to get me inspired again to do the things I want. I know being unproductive all day would make me feel like crap, so it is nice to have these reminders to get me back in the mood. I will say I am not 100% in a motivated, inspirational mood. It takes a bit of work to get the things I want done, but it happens, and that is fine.

It always feels good to finish a productive task, no matter how big or small it is. Try to remind yourself, or ask yourself. “Am I living a living with purpose or meaning?,” or “Is what I am doing benefiting me in any way?” These questions can help push you back to a motivated spirit. Accept these times. Embrace the challenge it brings. Appreciate the steps you take to get things done. Put your energy into the positive, rather than taking in negative energy. You will get things done on your own time, baby steps, productivity mode comes and goes. Try not to stress about getting everything done. You will get there if you keep working at it.

I read this passage in my mindfulness book this morning. It reminded me of this post. It shows no matter how small the step is. It is still progress to what you want to get done. Just take those small steps when feeling unmotivated/uninspired. It may actually get you back in the mood of production. If it doesn’t, you were still able to get something done.

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Be Appreciative. Be Positive. Live A Happy Life

I wanted to write this post to share my new mindset of being positive and appreciative. I should make this one of my goals for 2020. I kind of started to do this last year, along my journey with mindfulness. I really like to practice this a bit more this year.

I think this is a great mindset to have. It has made me a much more happy and content person. I like to focus my energy on the positive, and be appreciative of life. I don’t want to be consumed by negativity. I see myself being more at peace, calm, and happy now that I decided to see the bright side of life. I am in control of how I perceive things. I can either choose to be angry, bitter, sad, or miserable, or I can choose to be joyful, appreciative, calm and happy. I choose the latter. We should all choose that path if we want a satisfying and peaceful life. I want to focus my energy on positivity.

I have gotten a mindfulness book this Christmas. There are many wonderful exercises I can do to be mindful. It had me do a lovely exercise of dish washing, but it allowed me to be appreciative of the task, and focus my energy on the moment of the task. How the water felt, how my hands felt,etc. It allowed me to appreciate that I can walk, and use my hands to do the task. I also appreciate that I have clean water, and cleaning supplies to do so as well. It made me see this tedious task in a different light. It made me appreciate it more. If you can learn to appreciate simple tasks like that. It makes you much more appreciative of the whole scheme of things. It makes you appreciate life more.

Work has been difficult at times. I have been exhausted from all the work we have, and overworking myself. I can choose to focus on the disorganization, or the fact that they need more workers, or the fact that I am exhausted from the work and overtime.

But I choose to put my energy on the benefits of having the job. Money to get the things I want, and to experience the things I like. Health benefits that have been useful to me recently, especially Dental. Also, the lovely paycheck I will get from Overtime to help pay off cards and loans I need to pay off. Also, the lovely coworkers I have. That make work a bit more enjoyable. I actually do like my job, but it can be overwhelming at times. I also decided not to overwork myself as much to get things done quicker. I will do what I can, but nothing more. I shouldn’t give more, than everyone else. I tried that practice out Friday, and it made work much more easier and enjoyable. I felt much better.

In the end, it is the choice of the individual how we choose to perceive things. Either we focus on the good or the bad. Either we choose to be miserable or content. It is up to you. I chose happiness and peace of mind. Now I mentioned happiness isn’t stable, but with this mindset you will have a happier mindset. There will be more happiness, rather than sadness. You can be able to enjoy life much more.

I always try to remind myself, why be sad, when you can be happy. Who needs to be negative. When you can be positive. There is enough negativity in the world. I want to spread positivity. Grant it, we will get sad, that is life, but if I can control more happiness in my life. I will do that as much as possible. Always choose happiness over misery when you can. Life will have its bumps. Life will have its struggles. We just got to learn to combat it with positivity and appreciation, and the coping process will become much smoother.

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Embrace Getting Older

I have now turned a year older, so I thought this would be an appropriate post to write. Most do not like this concept. It just means we are closer to death. Time is passing. The clock is ticking. I have so many things I need to do. I haven’t been able to achieve the things I wanted by this time. These things go through the heads of most people who dread getting older. We live in a society that shuns getting older. We think our lives are over by a certain age, but it doesn’t have to be that way.

I have come to terms with getting older. I no longer feel shame, or sadness about turning a year older. I have learned to be proud of my age. Maybe it is the fact that my 30’s have been the best years of my life physically, mentally, and emotionally. This can all be because of practicing mindfulness. I say you are as old and young as the mind feels.

If you are living in the moment. Getting out there, and doing the things you love to do, experiencing life. Working towards your goals. You can feel as young as you need to be. I think mindfulness has allowed me to embrace getting older, because I learned to accept what is. Getting older will happen, if you like it, or not. It is better to embrace it, and learn to see the positives of it, than to create a mindset of sadness and negativity.

I like to remind myself that not everyone gets a chance to live to their 30’s and up. You hear people say, ‘he/she died so young,’ and feel so much sadness. Yes, it is sad. This is why you should be proud to reach an new age. You made it another year. You got the opportunity to live a year longer. You got to see this from this perspective. We feel sad when people die young, but feel sad when we get older. It is quite a juxtaposition. I say be proud that you have lived to feel old. Not everyone gets that chance. It is something you should be proud of in this unpredictable world.

The problem is people focus on the past. They have regrets, or missing what was. They look back on their youth, and think about the ‘good times.’ The past is the past. You can’t go back. You can’t change it. The things you can do is embrace it. Be happy  that you had the experiences you had in the past. Try not to look back with regrets, but with fond memories.  Focus on today, and enjoy your life now. so you don’t have regrets on your death bed. Put energy into your physical and mental health, so you are as energetic and vibrant at an older age. I see people in their 60’s thinking their lives are over, and it doesn’t have to be that way. You can still do things, and live a fulfilling life at that age.

Getting older shouldn’t make us sad. It should make us proud. Living a long, and fulfilling life should be a goal to everyone. Embrace the years that you are able to have. You have the opportunity to right wrongs. To work on your mistakes. To experience new things. To live life the best way you can. This can all happen by having the opportunity to get older.

I am in my 30’s. In no way is that old, but when I reach my 60’s and up. I like to feel as good as I can be at that age. I try to eat healthy, and exercise, because I want to live a fulfilling life as long as I can. Life is unpredictable, but I do have some control over things, so I will do what I can. You are only as old, as you think you are. You have control of what you think.

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The Art of Complaining

Complaining is that act of expression of annoyance or dissatisfaction in something.  I like to write this post for my readers, so you don’t fall into the trap of complaining, whether it be receiving, or giving. Expressing our feelings of annoyance and dissatisfaction can be good for us. The problem lies is when it is consistent, constant, and negative. This is how complaining can be a problem for yourself and others.

Being a complainer, and being on the other end of a complainer cultivates negativity. Avoiding negativity is something we should try to do. Complaining can be burdensome, so it best to avoid this problem child at all cost.

There is a difference between complaining, and sharing your concerns. There is nothing wrong with sharing your concerns. Talking about what is bothering you can be helpful and therapeutic. This is about sharing your thoughts with someone, having someone listen,  showing compassion and empathy, and maybe them sharing their thoughts on the situation. The person may take things said into consideration, and come to a conclusion, or solution on their own. This is a healthy talk.

Now when someone talks about things in a negative light, only focusing on the negative of the situation, refuses to listen to others thoughts, refuses to find solutions or take action, and continues to talk about the same problem over and over again with absolutely no solution is when it becomes unhealthy, burdensome, and honestly rather annoying.

This behavior is toxic, negative, and pretty selfish on the individual’s part, if I say so. We must remember that the world doesn’t evolve around you, me, or anyone. Your problems are your problems, no one else’s. The individual is the only one who can fix the problem of the individual. Spreading your negativity to others just puts the complainer in a bad light among others.

A complainer should remember that we all have problems, and we don’t need more problems pushed on us. What if an individual is dealing with things, and wants to step away from their own problems, and wants to be positive, or be around positive energy?, but a complainer decides to push their negative behavior on to them, talking about all their problems, and creating negative energy. This then, pushes them back down to negativity.

This is something to think about when complaining. Everyone has their battles. No one is special in this aspect. Being compassionate, and understanding that others are struggling, and may not want your problems, and negativity is an important skill to have. It is also best as the receiver to stay away from a person with this bad habit. We must learn to keep negative energy away from ourselves.

We must learn as individuals that nothing beneficial comes from complaining. It creates negativity. It pushes people away from you, because really, who wants that type of negativity in their lives? It is also annoying and burdensome to deal with. It solves nothing, because the individual isn’t trying to find a solution. They just want others pity and sympathy, but the opposite tends to happen. The thing we must learn is to express our problems in a more constructive way, and the realization that the individual problems can only be fixed by the individual.

If you have a problem, talk to others, hear their thoughts, be realistic, and don’t make excuses. Look to figure out how to deal with the problem. If you do these things it will stop you from a consistent pattern of complaining about the same thing.

You are in control of how things work out in your life. We must try to make a positive impact on ourselves and others, not cultivate negative energy. We must build others up, support them. Avoiding complaining is one way to do so.

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Food for Thought Post

IMAG0301How I enjoy finding a passage that speaks to me, and inspires me. These are my thoughts on this subject.

Let go of the need to control others and the world. You as an individual cannot fix the world and others. Try not to put that pressure on yourself. It is a  losing battle. It creates negative energy. What you can do is put the focus on you. That is what you can control. This is what creates more positive energy. Peace and happiness will ensue.

I hope reading this give you a little bit more of a perspective on this topic. It is wonderful to just let go, and be free from the constraints of wanting to be in control of everything.

2019 Yearly Reflection & 2020 Planning

It is close to the end of the year. Yay! Give yourself a round of applause you made it through another year! It is now time to reflect on the year. It is also time to look forward, and start planning for next year.

I know mindfulness is all about living in the moment. But reflecting on the past, and planning for the future cultivates positive energy. It can help build you up, help you learn more about yourself, and help make improvements for you to grow, and develop.

There are a couple of questions I like to think about for my yearly reflection and planning. I thought I share them, and hopefully get you thinking about it as well.

1.Positives of the year?: We got to start positive. I like to think about the positive things that happened this year, or even positive people that were brought to my life this year. Some positives for me would be finally going to the dentist(been meaning to this for years now). Another would be getting a better paying job. Another one would be meeting new people to connect with. These are some things to think about. It allows you to focus your energy on the positives, and show you that the year had some, or many good moments.

2.Challenges of the year?:Now flip to the other side of the coin. I think it is important to look at the difficulties we faced this year. I didn’t really have many this year, compared to last year. One was searching for a new job. Doing something new can be challenging for me. Also, being able to get comfortable at a new job. It is still uncomfortable, but I manage through it. I am proud that I was able to get through it. Challenges are learning experiences, and help us grow. We shouldn’t push these moments aside. Embrace them. They are part of our journey as well. Looking through this can show how far you come, and make you proud for getting through it.

3.Things that benefited me this year?: Now time to focus on the things that benefited me and you. What helped us grow. What helped us physically, mentally and emotionally. For me, eating healthier, exercising more, drinking more water, reducing sugar, and being remaining mindful have been a huge benefit for me.

4.Things I learned this year?:Think about what you learned. Be it educational, life lessons, experiences etc. I learned many things about the universe. I learned that being mindful has made me more aware of myself and my emotions. I learned to embrace challenges. Learning is important in life, so it is good to look at all your learning experiences you had this year.

5.How Did I grow this year?: Pretty important to see your growth in the year. It really shows how far you have gone. For me, it being able to handle my emotions much better, not being as judgmental or negative. I don’t gossip as much anymore, don’t feel the need to do that. I really love this improvement in my life. It promotes peace, and positivity in my life. Life is all about self-development.

6.Achievements this year?: This can fall into the positive this year as well, but I wanted to have this question on its own. This one just focusing on achievements. I was able to finish a Mindfulness course with a 100%. I was able to see the dentist, overcoming my fear. I was able to get a new job with better pay, and insurance. I spent less money, which promotes my minimalist mindset. I continued to exercise, and eat healthy throughout the year. These are all proud moments of mine. Now I like you to look at your proud moments. Make note to be proud of all your achievements this year.

7.Things I can work on/Improve upon?: I think it is good to look at what can be improved. Something to work towards for the new year? No one is perfect. There is always room for growth. For me, it would be reading more. I didn’t read as much as I wanted to this year. Another is learning more. I used to read, and watch educational stuff all the time, but recently I haven’t been doing that as much. I like to get back to that mindset. Learning, and gaining knowledge is important, so I will work towards that in the new year.

8.Goals for 2020?: Last, but definitely not least. What is you want to do for next year. I have many goals for next year, and I am pretty excited about it. I like to read a book every month. I like to take a course every quarter of the month. I like to pay off my credit cards. I am excited about trying these things out. I wrote all of them down to have a visual, and keep me on task. I think it would be good to try that as well.

This really makes me look forward to the new year. There are so many possibilities in the new year, so take advantage of it, and figure out ways to work towards your dreams and goals. Make sure they are manageable, specific, and simple. This will make it easier to achieve them.

Hopefully these questions were helpful to you, like they are for me. I wish you all a lovely Christmas and happy new year. I love you all, and I appreciate you guys very much<333 Always try to be mindful, positive and compassionate towards yourself and others.

Depend On Yourself

We should try to learn to depend on ourselves. Try not to look to others, or external things to bring us happiness or fulfillment. Being independent can be a tough battle. What many don’t understand is that being dependent on others can lead to misery, sadness, loneliness, and disappointment.

Others aren’t always going to be there, or say the right thing. Others can’t fix you. That must come from you. Learning to fix yourself promotes freedom, strength, and peace of mind. There is so much strength in being able to get yourself out of the tough times, struggles, or down times. I mean, doesn’t it feel great when you are able to fix things on your own?

Now asking for advice, or guidance is not a problem. We all need guidance, but it becomes a problem when you expect others to fix, or solve the problems you are having. The thing is no one else, or any external thing can solve it. That must always come from the individual, so being able to learn how to self cope is important.

We all have our own problems, struggles, and battles. We must remember that it is no one’s job to fix us, and it isn’t our job to fix others. I can’t give others happiness, satisfaction, or fulfillment, and others can’t do that for me. We as individuals must learn to do that ourselves.

Society may allow us to think that we must be around others all the time. I get it we are social creatures, but trying to be by yourself, and do your own thing is just as important. I am not saying live in total isolation. You always need balance. Being able to be alone can allow you to be free. It can help you learn about yourself, reflect on who you are, and give you the chance to accept the person you are, which then can help you learn how to deal with down times on your own, without the help of others, or outside sources.

So try doing your own thing. Try depending on yourself. There is a stigma of being alone, and there really shouldn’t. How can we know who we are, if we look to others to define us? , or depend on others all the time? If we don’t spend some quality time alone? You can’t. We must give ourselves the space to be free, grow, and develop.

Doing my own thing gives me the space to do the things I enjoy that maybe I can’t do with others. It is the time I truly feel free. Connecting with others, being around others is great, and very important. On the other side, being alone can be just as great. We need our independence, our individuality. Dependency strips us from our individuality, and freedom.

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Judgment

Judgment is the ability to make considered decisions, or come to sensible conclusions. These type of judgments are most likely made the minority of the time. Normally when we make judgments they are normally not well planned out, or thought out. The judgments we tend to make most of the time are thoughts about ourselves, others, and our world through our own point of view. They tend to be skeptical, critical, and negative.

Judgments about  ourselves, others, and the world can be helpful for us to understand, and evaluate the world around us. But sometimes they can be shortcuts we make that don’t always tell the truth, and they can be destructive. It can have a negative effect on how we see ourselves, others, and the world.

Judgments are created from the ego, focusing only on the perspective of the individual, trying to make the individual right, making the individual look better. This usually comes from judgments of others. When we judge ourselves, it is mostly putting ourselves down. It tends to mostly be negative.

Judgments should be constructive, based on reality. It should be helpful for us to navigate the world. But we tend to use it in more of a destructive, negative way. Part of mindfulness is non-judgment. Just seeing the world as it is without putting our thoughts into it. This is extremely difficult for us humans to do. We love to evaluate and investigate, which is a great thing. The thing we should be aware of is when it is beneficial, and when it is harmful.

Is what I am thinking really helpful, or constructive? Should I be judging this situation, or person the way I am? Do I have a right to say this when I am not prefect myself?

Through my mindfulness journey it is still difficult not to make judgments. It is hard not to create story lines for the world around us. Just seeing things for what is just is, isn’t an easy concept for us to grasp. Can I just say it is a book, without adding my own thoughts about it? Did I like it? Does it look interesting? Can I just see a person, and just say that is a person without adding my own thoughts of what they are wearing or, why they shouldn’t be wearing it?, Or hear a person’s life story without putting my thoughts into what they should have done? or, what I would have done instead? ,Or when I make a mistake, not judging myself that I am an ‘idiot,’ or, ‘stupid.’ I simply just made a mistake.

It is hard to just stop making judgments, but being aware is always important. Awareness can help us limit judgments. It can also alert us when we are doing it. I always catch myself making judgments about myself, and others. The good thing is I am aware of these judgments. I try to learn from them, and improve. I realize what I think isn’t fact, just my opinion/my perspective. To believe your thoughts are facts is delusional. It is a battle, but I continue to learn and grow. One thing is not to judge yourself for being judgmental, kind of counter intuitive. Just remember it is part of being human, but we can always learn and improve.

Remember to think, is it helpful, constructive, or beneficial to myself, or others? If it is not, try to limit that type of judgment. Like the definition in the beginning. Judgments should be well thought out, and based on reality, not thoughts created by our world of story lines. Judgments are part of human nature. We needed it to survive, during primitive times. It is all about being aware of what is the truth, and what we want to perceive through rose colored glasses. I still make judgments. You will still make judgments, but awareness and limitation can go along way.

 

Motivation

Motivation is the desire to act in service of a goal. It’s the crucial element in setting and attaining one’s objectives—and research shows that people can influence their own levels of motivation and self-control(Psychology Today).

There are many things that can motivate an individual. Motivation helps us achieve our goals. It helps us achieve the things that need to get done. It isn’t always easy to get the motivation to do things though. There are so many things we like to do, but just don’t have the push to do so.

I am writing this post to talk about the thing that helps push myself to get what I want done. There are a couple of things I don’t want to do, but know I need to do for my over all health,self-growth and happiness. So what exactly motivates me to do it?

Thinking long term. Yes, while at the moment it doesn’t seem fun to do the thing I want to do. I know that the long term benefits outweigh the short term struggles of getting what I need done.

I know mindfulness is all about focusing on the moment, but when it comes to reaching, or attaining your goals. It is important to remember the long term benefits. This type of thinking helps push me to do what needs to be done. My thoughts, just get it done, and over with. My mind, and body will thank me later. And it is always rewarding to be able to do what needs to be done. It helps promote a positive mindset for being able to achieve what needed to be done.

There a couple of things that I didn’t really want to do. One thing was going to the dentist. It has been awhile, since I went, but I knew I needed to go. I was anxious of what might happen. A small part of me wanted to not go, but the larger part of me knew it was best for my health to go. Thinking of the long term benefits pushed me to go. I went, and things didn’t go as bad as I thought. It wasn’t even a bad experience. I was happy to finally get things fixed, and work on my overall health.

Some other things that I struggle to do is write for my blog post and exercise. It is always a struggle to start, but I know I can get great benefits from doing these things. I always try to remember the lovely feelings I get from finishing these tasks. The benefits of helping others, and getting my thoughts out when it comes to writing. And keeping my self healthy and rejuvenated from working out. I always try to think of what benefits I can get from doing tasks I am particularly not fond of doing at the moment. I do enjoy these tasks once I get into them, but starting it can be rough.

These tasks normally take about 30 minutes to an hour of my time. That isn’t long. These things normally don’t take that long. We got plenty of time in the day to achieve the things we need to get done for our overall health, happiness, and attaining our goals. You just need that push to do it. Mine is thinking long term. Yours may be different. You just got to find the thing that can motivate you. Achieving our goals is important. Being healthy mentally, and physically is important. Finding contentment and happiness is important.

Motivation allows us to achieve these things. You may want to keep pushing something off, but remember it has to get done eventually. Why not doing it now! The moment is now. You do it now, it is done and over with, and you will feel much better for it.

The present moment is the time to achieve your goals. This can greatly benefit your future self. Try not to let the past deter you from doing things. I feel down from not doing it yesterday, so why bother doing it today? You can always start fresh. It is always about the moment.Motivation is an important tool to get us where we need to be.

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