Try not to focus on the negative headlines you see, rather focus on how nice and sunny it is outside, or the nice warm home you are living in, or that you have the ability to use your five senses in the world. Train your mind to focus on what you have, and what is good in the world. Focusing on the negative does nothing for you. There is nothing you can do about the negative aspects of the world. But if you look towards the positive and beauty. Peace and joy will enter your life. Choose the path that makes your life more peaceful. Life is already difficult. Make it easier on yourself, and put your mind to good use. Be an inspiration. Be productive. Be proactive. Be creative.
Mistakes happen in life, try not to let guilt or regret consume oneself. We are all in the process of learning and growing. We live and we learn. Be kind to yourself, don’t push yourself too hard. Just do the best you can. No one is perfect.
Make Something Out of Challenges in Life
I recently experience a difficult situation. I have thankfully moved past it, but at the time it was hard. After the experience, I really wanted to make something out of it, and learn from it. I think it is a wasted opportunity to not make changes, or make improvements when life hands you a challenge. Challenges are lessons to be learned.
I had to rearrange a lot of my stuff, because they had to fix our carpet. I realized I had too much stuff. This situation taught me things can easily be lost, or damage, so I decided I need to rid myself of things I had too much of. I have now decided to put a couple of things on my no buy list, this includes, clothes, books, tarot/oracle cards and notebooks. It made take a more minimalistic approach to things. Collecting too many things is too much when it can easily be lost. Attachment does create suffering. I was stressed about all the things I could lose, but if I lessen all the things I have, the next time won’t be as stressful.
I think it is nice having less things. I can go through my clothes with so much more ease. It has pushed me to finally go to the library and rummage through all the collections of books they have there. This situation has given me an appreciation for what I have now. It also showed not to spend too much on things, but rather on experiences.
During the time I was away from home, while they were working on my house I came to this conclusion. I need to switch my mindset to how to take on this challenge? What can I do to improve my living situation? This is a test the universe and maybe my soul has given me. I see there being 4 stages. Resistance, depression, acceptance, then resilience, then learning. Take something out of a difficult situation, make something positive out of it. I am now in a better place, and I am much stronger for going through what I went through. The experience does suck, but the aftermath can benefit you in many ways.
Is about learning about your shadow self. Looking at your flaws, and recognizing that it is part of you, and that is okay. We are a working progress. Trying to be perfect, or being perfect is impossible, but improving and being better is.
Growth is about facing fears. Part of growth is about challenging yourself and doing things you may not want to do, but may need to become more resilient and a better version of oneself. Awareness of your good and bad traits is important for our journey of growth.
We strive to reach higher heights. We are always searching for more. What is my life purpose? What more can I do? How much higher I can go? We are always on a journey to improvement. It is important to recognize your dark side. By doing this, it helps you confront your demons, and allows you to work on them. We all have flaws. We all have room for improvement.
We shouldn’t be judgmental or critical of ourselves, and others for that matter. Remember everyone has room to grow. You are not alone. Life is a journey. Life is hard. We are here to learn, to improve, to face challenges, and grow.
Be kind, be compassionate, be gentle to oneself. Working on ourselves, and through our struggles is hard, but with baby steps you will see improvements. The first step is awareness, and you can move forward from there.
There are still things I am working on, and I will continue to try to improve these flaws, or bad habits. Remember, we can never be a perfect being. We are not here to be perfect. We can try to strive to be a better version of ourselves. If we fail, we keep trying. All you can do is try. The effort is what matters. Effort will lead to success in some form or other.
Let Go of Control
We may be able to control some aspects of our lives, but mostly the universe takes most of the control. Life is unpredictable. Let go of the need to control everything. We can’t fix everything. We can’t change everything. Life is unfair. Bad things happen. Getting angry and upset does nothing for you. Put that energy in making positive changes for yourself and others. Let go a little bit. Life life. Enjoy the beauty it has to offer.
Having a plan for the day is great, setting an intention is also great. Expect the best, but leave room for changes. As someone who plans ahead, this can be hard, but I am also aware life is unpredictable, and things won’t always go according to plan. It helps alleviate the devastation of things not working out. Be prepared and be aware. Improvise and be creative, figure out ways to make the best of unpredictable situations.
Carving your own path(self-care journey)
As we look to others for guidance on self-care, motivational tips, or self help tips. It is important to know looking within ourselves and experiencing things for ourselves will be the major factor in helping oneself achieve their goals, find peace of mind and evolve as an individual. We can consume as much self-help content as we like, but our own journey is what really teach us the lessons we need to learn in life.
I consume many self-help vlogs, podcasts and books for inspiration and creativity. I do find I learn the best from my own experiences through trial and error by finding ways that work best for me. Taking action is how I learn and evolve. Consuming can only get you so far.
We are all different individuals, so there isn’t one size fits all self-care tips. What works for one individual, may not work for another. This is a continues journey, so people’s opinions on things change as they continue through their journey. I know mine has. It is a natural process on our journey through life.
It is important not to follow guidance step by step, word for word, tip for tip. They are a guide, a footprint, a baseline. Take in what works for you. In the end, it is up to you to figure out ways that helps improve your well being. Also, majority of these things are recycled again and again, just worded differently through the perspective of the person giving out the advice.
Take others advice, including mine with a grain of salt. What works for them, may not work for you. Different environments, different personalities, different lifestyles affect what works for an individual. Take in what you can, and create elements that can work for you. All in all, the journey to improving your life starts with you, and your willingness to take actions. Others may help, but your work is what truly matters.
I made a post about productivity a couple of posts ago. Although, being productive is great for us, it can also get to the point of toxicity if we do too much. Like I mentioned before, balance is key, too much of anything can be toxic.
I slightly fell into this trap last Sunday. I have been on a productivity kick last month, but there comes a time you are just not feeling it, or are too burned out mentally to be productive.
I spent most of my Sunday working on my course, and doing my personality analysis. After 6, my brain couldn’t do anymore. I wanted to do the last two analysis, but knew I couldn’t do more, so called it a day. I decided to watch some entertaining Youtube videos to relax.
About an hour of watching. I did start to feel some guilt. I thought I should be more mindful and productive. After a conversation with myself( I do this to work through my emotions/thoughts). I realized after my hard work. I deserved a break to entertain myself. I get into the headspace of having to be productive and mindful all the time. Equating distractions to being a bad thing. We need to entertain ourselves to relax. Being passive to recharge. I can’t always be on, especially after doing so much mental work.
The problem is consuming too much, but on the other side, a problem is being to productive, which can create burnout, and the ability to lose your creative juice. We shouldn’t have too much of anything, even if that thing is good for us. Balance is key. I think it is important to write this, because no one can be mindful/productive at all times, even if people make it seem that way. People may sell that story, but it isn’t reality.
Make habits simple and easy
What has made my new habits more sustainable is by making them simple and easy. I have gotten back into the habit of doing yoga. What had made me stop is because I made it too difficult for myself to maintain the habit by making the habit to restrict time wise. I wanted to do 30 minute sessions each time, but that was too much for me, so I have now cut it down to 10 minutes, or I just do what I can. By doing this it has made the habit more sustainable. I was only motivated to do the 30 minute sessions once a week, but by cutting it down I have been motivated to do it more times in a week, allowing my total minutes a week go up, so a win there. Small steps creates bigger outcomes.
I also stopped trying to read books by chapter, and just read what I can. I realized I would face resistance if I felt the need to read a chapter a day, but by just reading what I can creates a space and freedom to read more often. By just making the habit simple and less restrictive, instead of doing more than you can handle, allows me to continue to do the habit. Putting a time limit on a habit creates resistance, instead just do what you can. 1-3 pages a day is better than not reading at all. One page is still getting the reading you want done. This also goes with coloring for me. I simply do what I can. It allows me to enjoy the hobby more, and repeat the practice. I color for as long as I want, rather than try to finish a whole page.
You may not feel like doing something for a certain period of time one day, so try not to put a time constraint on the habit. Just make the intention to do what you can. Make it simple, easy, and less restrictive. The habit to do it more often than not will become easier.
My habit of meditating hasn’t been consistent, because once again, time constraint was put into it. Now I just sit and see where it goes. If I do it for one minute, that is meditating, if 10 minutes, I meditated. Going with the flow has helped the habit to stick, rather than forcing myself to do 10 minute sessions.
After awhile these habits do get harder to maintain daily. I have been practicing Spanish and Korean. At first, I enjoyed practicing everyday, but that eventually died down. I recognized 3 things that stop us from continuing a new practice/habit. The 1st is excitement dies down. When you first start a habit, the excitement of something novel keeps us motivated to do the habit, but as the habit gets repeated the novelty and excitement dies down, so you lose that motivation to continue. The 2nd is things are not progressing as fast as you like. We tend to want quick results, so if we don’t see it. We give up. I started losing motivation, because I wasn’t learning fast enough. The 3rd is the habit isn’t as easy to do. Now that the excitement is gone. I realize learning a new language isn’t quite easy.
These three things create resistance, which pushes us to stop. Although, I did give up for a bit. I realized these three things, and asked myself if this is really what I wanted to do, did I want to keep learning, the answer was yes, so that pushed me to keep at it. This goes for any habits of mine that I want to continue. The important thing is if this is something you really want to do. I just need to remind myself that things won’t be as easy and go as quickly as I want, but the more I practice the easier it gets, and the more fluent I will get. As I continue I am understanding the language more and more. It is also important to give yourself the opportunity to take days off.
I don’t feel like learning everyday, so I don’t learn. Things are not lost if you have a day off, or two. Because I know the importance of learning. I always find my way back. I think we get stuck with having to do it everyday, but that isn’t reality. I am not always in the mood to do a certain habit that I want everyday, and that is okay. I know I will get back to doing it, because I know it is something I want to do. I haven’t done yoga in a week, but this week I am feeling it, so will get back to doing it again. It comes and goes. You get back on it. Completely giving up on something you want to do to better yourself won’t help you in the long run, and will create guilt and misery. This is why making habits simple, easy, and less restrictive is so important.
Create Moments/engage with the world
I am making more of an intention to engage with the world, rather than passively scroll online, or watch Youtube/Netflix. I want to create experiences, and be creative by actively living in the moment. I like to do things that help me learn and grow.
I have recently been trying to learn more Spanish and Korean. I have been listening to more Podcast. I have made the intention to color more. I have been doing lots of writing for my blogs, and for my course. I have also started making videos. I just want to make more time being active.
I like to live more intentionally and mindfully. Life is about creating moments. Finding little joys along the way. The more I practice living intentionally. The easier the habits become. Engaging means being creative, productive, working on your craft, and connecting with yourself, others and the world around you. I try to build my day around things that spark joy, creativity, growth and value.
I will say recently I haven’t been as mindful as the past couple of weeks, and I have been watching more Youtube and Netflix, but that is totally okay. We need balance. We will not 100% be productive, creative, or mindful all the time. Allow yourself to be passive without guilt. But there should always be an intention to create moments in anyway that suits you. You will be at ease, happier, and find more peace, and rewarding moments if you do so.
Feel all emotions
Listening to Adele’s new album. I just love how open she is to being vulnerable, and expressing her low emotions with the world. It made me think, how important it is to feel all emotions, and embrace them all. We are humans. We will feel all sorts of emotions in this rollercoaster we call life. Just remember if you distance yourself from feeling the uncomfortable emotions. You will also numb the feelings of the comfortable and more enjoyable emotions. No emotion is bad, or should be suppressed. Emotions tell us something about ourselves, our thoughts, and our world view. We can choose to use it against us, or use it as fuel to better ourselves. You are not horrible for feeling difficult emotions. This is all part of being a human, unless you are a Psychopath, and not sure you want that. Embrace, accept, and learn.