Little Mindful Reminders

Hello my lovely followers. I am staying home preparing for the storm coming. I just wanted to post some mindful reminders I use for myself. I remembered having them, while doing my mindful evening routine. I haven’t read them in awhile. It is nice to look back on them. Some are more relevant to me at the moment, than others. Maybe they can be helpful for you, or maybe you have, or can make some of your own. I did revamp some of them. I also make new reminders if something new pops up, and I want to make a reminder for future references. I think these are nice to have around whenever you need that reminder. Please don’t mind the handwritten, not the best hand writer, but still wanted to show them, because hey, we all got our flaws. I still think these are useful.

There is also something else I like to write. I wrote down some phrases as well. At first I wrote down ‘Be this’ or ‘Be that,’ but then switched it to ‘Find this’ or ‘Find that.’ I realized that saying “be” makes it sound easy, it isn’t, find is a better word, because you got to search and work for these things in life. It won’t come easy, but it is available to you at all times. Have a lovely day or night everyone. Much love<333

Keys to Building Self-Esteem

When it comes to self-esteem balance is important. Too much or too little can can affect your relationships, your sense of self, your sense of reality, mental state. It is important to have a realistic view of oneself. Learning to appreciate the positive, and accepting the negatives, but not allowing the negatives to define you. Too high of a self-esteem only looks at the positives of oneself, to a point of exaggerating them. Vice versa for a lower self-esteem, having an exaggerated negative viewpoint of oneself, only focusing on the negative parts of oneself.

What is it?

In psychology, the term self-esteem is used to describe a person’s overall sense of self-worth or personal value. In other words, how much you appreciate and like yourself. It involves a variety of beliefs about yourself, such as the appraisal of your own appearance, beliefs, emotions, and behaviors(verywellmind).

Why is it important?

We need a good amount of self-esteem to help us reach our goals. To motivate us. To have the confidence to achieve the things we want to achieve. It helps build you for success. It allows you to be more open, honest, and assertive. It gives you freedom to be who are, no apologies. You learn to focus on your priorities and happiness, rather than on every one else’s.

I would like to discuss a couple of keys that can help build your confidence. These keys listed are from the lovely Julia Kristina. I really enjoy watching her videos, and I love her ideas. I will list the keys, and put my take on these keys.

  • Live mindfully-Being present is always the first step to self-growth and improvement. When you are present. You become aware. Being aware can help you recognize negative self-talk. It can allows you to reason and ask questions. Is this logical? Are these thoughts facts? Are these thoughts true? Would I say these things to a friend who was feeling down? Awareness can help us ask questions, learning to challenge these thoughts, reframe, and look at things more positively and realistically leading one to feel better about themselves.
  • Self-acceptance– A topic I discuss a lot, and the reason is because it is important to have this to live a more fulfilling, happier, and peaceful life. This is all about putting your focus on the positive aspects of oneself, using it to your advantage, and learning to acknowledge the negatives, either learning to grow from them, or accepting them as part of who you are. Acknowledging that no one is perfect and that is okay.
  • Taking responsibility-Learning you have control of what you want to do in life. We are responsible for our actions, our healing, how we cope, our achievements, our goals. No one can achieve your goals for you. No one can heal, or cope for you. No one can make you a happier individual. These are things you got to work for yourself. Giving yourself the opportunity to do things for oneself builds confidence, character, strength etc,. You learn what you are capable of, rather then leaning on others all the time. You can’t grow from that. If you don’t know your capabilities from taking responsibility. You can’t build a healthy self-esteem for oneself. Life situations and other people are out of your control, but your goals, achievements, actions, mindset, coping strategies, and success is up to you.
  • Self-assertiveness-Learning not to be afraid of saying what is on your mind, even if it may hurt others, or embarrass oneself. You as an individual has a voice too, and it should be heard. Now we shouldn’t be hurtful or harmful towards others, the intent shouldn’t be malicious, but if you need to voice an opinion, and get yourself heard, then you should speak up. It could upset someone, but if you speak with kindness and not in an aggressive manner. They may learn to understand your viewpoint. Remember, your voice matters too. Your thoughts matter too. No one is above another person. We all have a right to voice our thoughts and opinions.
  • Living a life of value-What brings you joy? What bring you happiness? What brings meaning to your life? What gives you purpose? What adds value to your life? What can help you evolve as a person? The answer to these questions are important for your well-being and life fulfillment. This also helps build a nice self-esteem. I feel good about myself when I take care of my plants. I feel good about myself when I write these blog posts. I feel good about myself when I had a nice productive, mindful day. I feel good when I practice yoga or meditation, when I listen to soothing sounds. All the things that make you feel good about yourself, that add value, do them! All of these things can help you to think better of yourself.
  • Living with integrity-Learning to live life the best way you can. All you can do is try. Trying to live as honest as you can. Working towards improving your life to bring happiness, wellness and peace to your life. Having a honest relationship with oneself is important. You can’t have a healthy relationship with someone who lies to you, so you can’t have one with yourself if you do so as well. Be as honest and as real as you can be. The freedom of it will set you free. This can teach you to love and appreciate oneself, and help boost one’s esteem.

These last two I came up on my own, while I was doing this research. I felt they should be added.

  • Learning to create more positive self-talk-Being able to build yourself up is so important for your self-esteem. Saying more positive things about yourself. We are so quick to put ourselves down, which leads to lower self-self-esteem and confidence. We got to learn to say more kind things to ourselves. It is easier for us to build others up when they are down, but then neglect ourselves. Try saying more kind things to oneself.
  • Find your strengths-Put your energy on your strengths, and utilize them. Recognizing and appreciating your strengths is a great esteem booster. You may have flaws, but learn to allow your strengths to shine brighter.
  • Focus on self-Giving yourself space to be alone. To become aware of your thoughts and feelings. Learning to have a better understanding of who you are is important to building your self-esteem. If you learn to be content with yourself. You learn to appreciate oneself.

I also wanted to add some signs of a healthy self-esteem I found on a Psychology Today article. I thought it would be helpful to add. Here they are.

  • Knows the difference between confidence and arrogance
  • Is not afraid of feedback
  • Does not people-please or seek approval
  • Is not afraid of conflict
  • Is able to set boundaries
  • Is able to voice needs and opinions
  • Is assertive, but not pushy
  • Is not a slave to perfection
  • Is not afraid of setbacks
  • Does not fear failure
  • Does not feel inferior
  • Accepts who they are

The list is pretty similar to the keys above. It shows how these keys are important to build a healthy self-esteem. Having a healthy self-esteem is important to living a successful and fulfilling life. Having peace with yourself is key to living the life you want.

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/self-esteem

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-self-esteem-2795868

Random Post(Reframing My Mindset)

Hello my lovely followers<333 I wanted to post something that happened to me last night that is relevant to what I blog about. I thought it would be something interesting to share, and helpful to share as well.

Last night I was having my mindful time. I was journaling, letting my thoughts out. I began thinking about my frustration and anger about having to go to work tomorrow. I was upset that work will be overwhelming, that I will have to work an area I don’t enjoy doing, but needs to be done, since no one else wants to do it. I also thought about how we get work near the end of our shift, making us work 12 hours. I was upset thinking about why we didn’t get work earlier, and how we have no work earlier, but get it at the end of the day. I was growing frustrated how disorganized the place can be. The cycle of negativity just kept spiraling and could keep going. I felt frustrated, tense, annoyed and angry. The thing with negativity, you find one thing, and then keep finding another thing after the other. You continue to dig deeper into the negativity hole.

I then realized what was happening and asked myself, what is this doing? Is this really helping me in any way? I didn’t want to keep spiraling into negativity, so I decided to switch things up, and look at the pros, the joys, the positives, and things I am grateful for in life. I thought about the fun plans I made with friends the next two weekends. That is something joyful to look forward to. I thought about all the lovely gifts I was able to buy this year, due to getting a better paying job. I absolutely love buying gifts!, so this is exciting for me. I also appreciate that this job gave me more financial security. I also realized that a part of me did want to get back to work, because of the movement and exercise I get from it. I also like routine and keeping busy, so getting back to work is important. After, looking at more of the pros. I started feeling more at ease and at peace.

The point of this post is being able to become aware of your thoughts, and where they are taking you is very important to understand, so that you can get to a better place mentally. The ability to reframe your thoughts to a more positive mindset is a skill that will be useful to bring you to a happier and more peaceful place.

Many people are overwhelmed with work. Many people are overworked. Many people deal with BS at work. I am not special. This awareness was kind of humbling. All this realization put me in a place of peace and calm. It has made the transition back to work much more easier. You don’t always have control of your thoughts that come to you, but you can always become aware, reframe and challenge them. It is not completely out of your control. I am now in a better place this morning, and ready to start the work week. I hope you all have a lovely week. Much love, peace and mindfulness.

Letting Emotions Out

We are taught to embrace and express “positive” emotions, but told to repress the “negative” emotions. This mindset isn’t necessarily healthy for us to do so. All of our emotions should be expressed and accepted, even appreciated. I know that may sound strange, but things can be learned from “negative” emotions. One can learn to evolve and grow from these emotions. It is important to let out these “negative” emotions, so that we don’t allow them to fester and permeate our minds and lives. It won’t help to keep them in, to use drugs, alcohol, food, or other unhealthy habits to repress them. Bottling in emotions can lead to lower level of well-being and makes one less likely to achieve goals.

I put quotations for positive and negative emotions, because emotions are not necessarily good or bad. It is how we perceive them. Emotions just are. They are there to tell us something. They are there to guide us. We tend to see the more difficult/uncomfortable ones as bad/negative, and see the more comfortable/uplifting ones as positive/good emotions. Difficult emotions tend to make us feel worse about ourselves and our lives. Uplifting emotions tend to make us feel better. It makes sense, we as humans like categorizing things to make things simple, but I like you to be aware that emotions in itself are not good or bad.

With practicing mindfulness, you learn to feel, understand and accept all emotions. You learn is okay to feel these emotions “good” or “bad.”. You may even see the beauty in it. Emotions is what makes us human. It shows that we are caring. If you don’t feel any of these, than that may be something to be concerned about. So what are some ways to express and let out these emotions?

  • Cry-Sometimes you just got to let out a good cry.
  • Take deep breaths-This is always a helpful strategy to help calm and sooth an individual.
  • Vent to others-Let others know what you are feeling. It always feels good to let out what you are thinking, having others listen, and getting some empathy from others.
  • Journal-Sometimes you don’t want to vent to others, or have no one to vent to. This is also a good way to let your thoughts and feelings out. Just getting your thoughts out on paper can be therapeutic.
  • Exercise-Can help reduce stress, helps increase brain health, thinking and memory. Increases levels of endorphins, dopamine and serotonin(feel good neurotransmitters and hormones). It also gives you a nice sense of accomplishment and makes you feel good about oneself.
  • Get creative-Fuel that energy into something creative can be helpful and can help you create something beautiful.
  • Listen to comforting music-It can be uplifting music that can help you get into a happier place, or sad songs that help comfort you, knowing others have gone through the same thing.

Another important reason why we should express our emotions.

  • You won’t be able to enjoy happiness and joy: You won’t be able to appreciate the good times as much. Feeling joy, happiness, excitement, accomplishment, appreciation are wonderful feelings to have, but if you try to repress the more difficult emotions. It will be just as hard to express the more uplifting ones as well.
  • Fighting emotions leads to more suffering: The more you fight it, the harder it will be to move one. The more you repress it with something else, the longer it will stay with you. Facing it is the best to heal.
  • It doesn’t allow you to live life fully: Feeling emotions makes us human. It allows us to experience life. It pushes us to evolve and grow. It shows us we are caring and compassionate individuals. It shows us we want to improve and become better individuals. It keeps us alert. It keeps us moving. We need emotions to live.

We don’t want emotions to be expressed in a harmful, hurtful way, or become persistent. The point is to feel the emotions, cope in a healthy way and move forward. You don’t want to ruminate over the emotions for a long period of time, but you also don’t want to skim pass and repress them. There needs to a balance. Allow yourself to feel the emotion, but recognize that the show must go on eventually, express it in a healthy manner, and this should allow you to move on from it.

Mindful Reminder(Taking the Small Steps)

I just bought this book to remind myself if a task is too daunting, or overwhelming. It is best to take small steps to reach your end goal. There are times when I am not motivated to do something I want to do, like working on a blog post, or answering the questions to my online course tests. When I lack the motivation, I decide to just do a bit at a time, rather than write a post in one shot. I space it out in a couple of days, writing a bit each day, and for my online course questions, I answer a couple of questions each day, instead of doing it all at once. This helps a lot. So by the end of the week it is done. I am able to accomplish my goal without overwhelming myself in the process. It is better to get a bit done at a time, rather than doing nothing. You still get that rewarding feeling of getting something done, rather than nothing.

As long as you take the steps, no matter how small you will eventually get there. It isn’t all or nothing. So remember if a tasks seems too much, or you lack motivation. Just take it small and easy. You want to try to make a task as manageable as possible, so you are able to achieve what you want to achieve. If you do this, you will get there with a much calmer mind. Lesson the stress load, it doesn’t have to be done in one day. I recommend this book if you struggle with getting things done and feel overwhelmed. Small steps is key and very powerful. Getting things done as quickly as possible is nice, but often leads to more stress and things not being done as efficiently.

Ways to Gain Mental Strength Part 2

I would like to continue my conversation on mental strength from my last post Ways to Gain Mental Strength. I stated that I will make another post on some other ways I have found online and through my own experience. As I mentioned, there are plenty of ways to gain mental strength. I will discuss a couple more habits that can be helpful. Through experience and practice you can learn to develop more of these habits to build on your mental strength and health.

  • Write positive aspects of every challenge-I really liked this one when I saw it. We tend to put more focus on the negative, but there could be a lesson learned, a better opportunity, a new way to learn, or maybe it can help you inspire others, and create a new path for you. There can be something there if you look for it, and change your perspective.
  • Practice 30 minutes of self-careGive yourself space to pamper yourself. To make yourself feel good. Remember, you can’t be your best to others, if you don’t treat yourself right first.
  • Say nice things to yourself-This may seem ridiculous or embarrassing to do, but starting with saying nice things to yourself, even small things, can help build self-kindness and compassion, to eventually love and confidence.
  • Practice more gratitude and less complaining-I mentioned many times that complaining solves nothing, and creates more negativity. Working on being more grateful can do wonders. I try my best to focus my energy on the good things in my life when I find myself getting into a negative space. It has helped my mental health vastly.
  • Accept adversity and challenges-It is important to recognize that challenges will arise. Being able to overcome obstacles and keep moving takes strength. It is tough, but you’ll get through it. This is something you want to remind yourself. This is all part of life experiences.
  • Learn to be alone-Some like more alone time, than others. There are some who really need to be around others, but we all need space from time to time. It doesn’t have to be a long period, but you got to allow yourself to think and feel for yourself. Giving yourself that space leads to more self understanding and awareness. Self soothing and reflection are very important, no one can truly help you, but yourself. Getting to know yourself better leads to a better mindset.
  • Practice self love-Once a person is able to love themselves. It is very hard to break that person down and deter them. They know who they are. They know what they want. They stand strong, and go after what can give them a better life.
  • Getting power over your emotions-Okay, you can’t control your emotions, but the power is how you handle them. Allow yourself to feel it. Give yourself space to let it out in a healthy way. Understand it is part of being human. Push through. Figure out ways to move forward, whatever way works best for you. Just try not to let the emotions consume you.
  • Seeing the other side-Having the ability to empathize and seeing others perspective helps build a stronger mindset.
  • Eat healthierStudies and research has shown that an unhealthy diet can lead to higher rates of low moods, depression and anxiety. Feeding your body with the right nutrients can help build mental strength and clarity.
  • Meditate-This cultivates inner peace, mental sharpness and clarity. When your mind is clear. There is much potential.
  • Be mindful-Practicing mindfulness had definitely played a part in being more mentally strong as an individual. Once you start being mindful, all of the other things above start to come into play. For me, it starts at learning to be present.

I can list many other things that can help one to become a mentally strong individual. There is a plethora of habits and practices out there. There are plenty of practices, but sometimes difficult for people to put into practice. It is all about awareness of where you are right now, and what can be done to improve your mindset, situation and circumstances.

A Different Type Of Holidays

As the covid cases continue to rise. It seems like the holidays will be a bit lonelier this year. My family has made the decision to cancel are Thanksgiving celebration. This is my favorite time of year to get with the family, eat some delicious foods. My favorites are my Aunt’s lasagna. I also enjoy some coquito, but our safety comes first.

I was a bit disappointed that I won’t be celebrating Thanksgiving with the family. I most likely won’t be for Christmas, or going anywhere for New Years as well, since I expect things will still be bad. I am sure many of you are in the same boat.

Although, it is a bit disappointing and disheartening. We got to do our best to keep our spirits up. I am now starting to get in the Christmas spirit. I usually wait, until after Thanksgiving, but since that day will just be a regular day for me. I am ready for the Christmas spirit. How I just love the ornaments, lights, music, and feel of Christmas, also the cookies and mint chocolates! You may not be able to spend time with loved ones, but there are still plenty of things to cheer about.

We must remember that safety is most important, and that you can always call, text, or video call your loved ones. Also, you don’t have to worry about the hassle of cooking a big meal, or traveling, so that can be a plus. The holidays will be different, but it doesn’t mean it has to be bad. Making the best out of it, and looking at the positives is important.

Life is always changing. Things don’t always stay the same. We got to learn to take on every challenge that comes our way, and do what it takes to make it work for us. How can you benefit from it? What are the positives? Learn, accept and keep moving. Do whatever you can to bring as much peace and happiness in your life. Things may seem bad, but it is in how you perceive it. Please stay safe out there everyone.

Seeing the Other Side

I think it is important, now more than ever, that we learn to see the other side. What I mean by this is being able to understand opposing, or different view points of others. Calling others with opposing views, or others you don’t understand harsh words is a simple solution to a more complex situation. People tend to prefer the easy way, make assumptions, make baseless claims, call others names. This type of behavior and language creates barriers, it cultivates hate, division, anger etc,.

Strength, maturity and wisdom is being able to push away your view points, and learn to hear the opposing view points to be able to come to an understanding. I always try to get outside of my bubble, challenge myself, and look further. It is okay to agree to disagree. We all come from different environments and backgrounds. Having the opportunity to listen and see the other side can build a world of compassion, kindness and peace. You can’t understand someone, unless you hear them out. I mean how many times have you made assumptions to find out the truth, and realize you made a mistake with that assumption? I know I have many times. It is comforting to be in our bubble, but we got to challenge ourselves to see the other side. Pushing away different view points does not help you grow. It keeps you stagnant in a perpetual world of ignorancy.

Assumptions are our way of understanding others and the world around us, but it doesn’t mean it is based on facts. It is through our own bias, and those are not facts. We got to open ourselves up to others view point. Judging and criticizing others for different view points is self-centered on the individual’s part. Your way does not mean it is the right way, and they are wrong. We do not think the same. Someone from the city will think differently, than someone from the countryside.

Instead of the harsh rhetoric towards others, which will get you no where. I mean, think about it, would you want to come to an understanding when someone is belittling you? The best way is treat others with kindness, hear them out, and open yourself up to a different world. You may come to realize they have a point in their views. You don’t have to agree, but learning to understand goes a long way. It creates less friction, anger, and tenseness in one’s life. I found so much peace in awareness and understanding of opposing views. I hope you all can to.

I really like the image below. It shows that there can be no right or wrong, just different ways of seeing things.

Maria Koromila on Twitter: "Understanding different perspectives matters  #communication #change #behavioralinsights… "

Take A Step Back to be Mindful

The past couple days have been a bit stressful. I have been glued to the screen, seen a bit too much negativity, but I also did see hope for a better tomorrow. I thought today will be a nice day to take a break from it, and get back to being more mindful. It has been really nice these days, so I took the opportunity to step outside for some fresh air, and view the beautiful scenery around me. This walk, along with doing a bit of running, yoga, and some journaling helped put me in a better place mentally and physically.

There will be times when you step away from mindfulness practices, but you can always step back, and reclaim your peace of mind. Journal to get your thoughts out, and confront them. Take a walk outside to get fresh air, and see the beauty of this world. Exercise to get some movement, and strengthen your body, and to increase our feel-good hormones(dopamine, serotonin, endorphins). Practice yoga to stretch and relax the body & mind. Meditate to calm the mind and gain clarity. Work on your goals, and be productive to gain a sense of accomplishment.

If you are feeling a bit stressed or down. Just remember that a bit of mindfulness can help bring you back to a better place mentally and physically. You may fall off track, but it will always be there when you need it. Giving yourself space to be present, and giving yourself space to focus on you is truly important, and something we should remember to do. I allowed too many of others opinions to consume my mind. Time to give my thoughts a time to shine. Always remember to look within yourself.

Ways to Gain Mental Strength

Mental Strength is the capacity of an individual to deal effectively with stressors, pressures and challenges and perform to the best of their ability, irrespective of the circumstances in which they find themselves (Clough, 2002).

Building mental strength is fundamental to living your best life. Just as we go to the gym and lift weights in order to build our physical muscles, we must also develop our mental health through the use of mental tools and techniques.

Optimal mental health helps us to live a life that we love, have meaningful social connections, and positive self-esteem. It also aids in our ability to take risks, try new things, and cope with any difficult situations that life may throw at us.”(PositivePsychology.com).

Being mentally strong is important for us to thrive in this world. It helps build confidence. It helps us cope with struggles, It helps us live a more fulfilling life. It also helps us find inner peace. It allows us to live a more satisfying life. It is important to find habits to help build one’s mental strength. There are plenty of ways to do so. I will list and discuss 9 ways described by Vlogger Clinical Psychologist Julia Kristina. I found her ways to be intriguing and helpful. I will link her video below if you like to look more into it. I will also make a part two of this with some habits I found online that seemed helpful, and from my own experience with gaining mental strength. I will first describe the 9 habits from Julia. I will incorporate my own ideas to what she mentions of course. I really liked her ideas, so I wanted to post them here.

  • Compassionate self-talk

How do you talk to yourself? That is an important question to think about. Is it mostly negative, self-defeating, self-blaming, or critical? Do you always put yourself down? Think about it, would you say these things to someone else? Why must you be so hard on yourself? Treat yourself with the same respect as you do to others. Try to tell yourself more nice things. Try to see more positive things in one self. Learn to pick yourself up, rather than bring you down. How you speak to yourself is very important in how one can gain mental strength. If you can’t pick yourself up, and motivate oneself, no one can. Try to tell yourself things that can help you and build you up. “I can do better next time,” I made a mistake, but that is part of being human, I can learn from this,” “I am a wonderful human being,” “I may not be good at this, but I am great at other things.” Try kinder, more encouraging language to oneself. It can only help you become stronger mentally.

  • Learn to observe thoughts

Your thoughts don’t define you. They are not based on reality. Thoughts are stories of the mind. We should try to remember this. Try not to allow them to dictate our feelings and behaviors. Just try to say to yourself, “Oh, I have this thought, or that one,” but those thoughts do not define you, others, or a certain situation. Just observe and move on. When we can observe thoughts more, and not allow them to sip into reality. We find more peace and a stronger sense of mental clarity.

  • Accept life for what it is

This is something I have mentioned a lot, but it is so important for your peace of mind and happiness to accept life for what it is, imperfect, difficult, full of struggles, most good things don’t come easy, most things aren’t handed to you, loss happens, endings happen. If you refuse to be aware of this, or accept it. Life will be much harder, and more miserable. Julia Kristina mentioned something that really resonated with me, she states, we say “why me?, but why not me?” Bad things can happen to all of us, no one is exempt. No one is invincible. Try to let go of the why me’s, life is not fair talk. It gets you no where, except miserable. Life is the way it is, but it also has plenty of positives and good to focus on as well. Things aren’t black and white.

  • Make Choices for oneself

The choices we make should mainly be for ourselves, our growth, and our happiness. We may have to sacrifice ourselves at times, but we shouldn’t all the time. Try not to make choices to please others. The majority of the things you think you have to do. You probably don’t really have to do. Try to let go of the guilt, and if there is a little guilt, so be it. There are times I feel a little guilty for the choices I make, but overall I am satisfied with the choice, because it was a choice I wanted to make. I didn’t do it to please someone else. Allow yourself to have choices with more confidence and less guilt. Being able to make choices for yourself without worries of the outcome is a helpful skill to build mental strength. When you allow yourself to make the choices you want. You gain a certain freedom from it.

  • Get out of comfort zone

You got to stop the wishing and waiting game, and just do it. The more you think about it, the less likely you will do it. A little bit of discomfort is good for you. It means you are moving towards growth. The fear and discomfort is from change/something new, but once you get past it, it will subside. The feeling of overcoming your fears will be very rewarding. Are you going to let fear control you, or do you want to take control? Fear will always be there. It is up to you what you do about it. Once you are able to face your fears. It will make you a much stronger individual mentally.

  • Accept failures/mistakes/bad decisions

One failure doesn’t make you a failure. Be proud that you took a chance, and put yourself out there. Now you know, and won’t have to wonder what if. Putting yourself out there, allowing yourself to possibly fail builds courage. I once had a job that didn’t work out, did I see it as a failure, no, did I learn from it, yes. Failures, mistakes, and bad decisions are learning tools for the future. No one is perfect, try not to beat yourself up for these things, if you do that, you may never learn from it. Accepting these things leaves space to grow, and cultivate mental strength. Once you accept, and get through the hurdle. It will be easier for you to put yourself out there. If you fail, you fail, but there is always an opportunity to flourish, and that will bring such a rewarding feeling to oneself.

  • Learn not to give up easily

Now there are times when things may get too stressful, or if it infringes on your mental well-being, than it is okay to quit, but most of the time people quit, because it may be harder than one thought, one may intimidated, scared, or one may think they aren’t good enough. You also may quit, because things aren’t moving faster than you thought it would. It is important to keep pushing, and not look for a smooth/easy ride. It will be hard at first, but once you get over the initial phases, things will get better and easier. Quitting may create comfort, but that isn’t always the answer. It is always best to push yourself if it is going to better yourself, and help you grow.

  • Learn not to look for immediate results/shortcuts

It would nice if things were handed to us, but we got to do the work. Fast results the majority of the time don’t give us the best result. You got to put in the work. You got to realize it takes time to reach your goals, or achieve the things you want. If you try to take the shortcut. You most likely won’t get where you need to go. If you do the work, even taking small steps at a time, you will eventually get where you need to go. The work can be hard and long, but if you take the small steps to get there. You will eventually reach your goals. It takes patience. It takes determination. It takes the awareness to understand that things don’t come fast and easy. Once you are able to cultivate this skill. This can help build your mental strength and perserverance.

  • Cultivate healthy boundaries

This is about learning to say no. This is about setting healthy boundaries for yourself, and the people around you. Having a sense of self, knowing your wants, or dislikes, and what you want from yourself and others. You don’t want to be tossed around in life by yourself, or from others. You want to learn to stand tall and strong. Learning what you want out of life, and not allowing others to dictate what you want to do. Its okay to say no, it is okay to feel a bit of guilt, but remember this is your life. You have the freedom to choose what you want to do with it for the most part. If you don’t want to do something, don’t. You may disappoint someone, but you are not responsible for someone else’s happiness. You are responsible for your own.

I am not saying be selfish, and never do anything for anyone, or not do things for someone if they need you. I am saying if you truly don’t want to do something, and it is something you dread, and it doesn’t create a happy atmosphere for you, or maybe there are times you just want to do your own thing, or just don’t want to do it. It is okay to say no. Saying yes all the times seeps happiness away from yourself. It can make life more stressful. It gives you less freedom. Learning to take a stand and say no, helps build healthier boundaries. You don’t want others to walk all over you. Appreciate yourself. Appreciate your wants. Doing this is another step to building mental strength.

I think these habits above are great habits to build mental strength. It can also help one find more happiness and inner peace in one’s life. I have implemented all of these habits and it has done wonders for my anxiety and mental health overall.

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