No Need to Rush(Live in the Moment)

I realized how fast I want the week to go, so that the weekend would come, but the weekend comes, and that time flies by as well, then the cycle begins again. We are now already in April of the new year. Time flies. I am already anticipating my adventures for the summer. I keep looking forward, but not living mindfully, and in the moment.

The moment is precious, but I and many others take it for granted at times. We continue to look forward. Rushing through the days, and then realize how time flies. The years, the weeks, and the days go by fast. I can’t just look forward to the weekends, that is only a couple of days out of the year. I got to try to enjoy each day of the year. Trying to embrace the moment as much as I can. I need to step back, pause, and live in the moment.

Yes, work can be difficult at times, but that doesn’t define my whole day. There are moments connecting with coworkers that are enjoyable. There are also moments before work that can be enjoyable as well. Life is too precious to just focus on the weekends, or special adventures. Although I can look forward to my summer adventures. Those moments are far off. The future isn’t here yet. Life is unpredictable, and nothing is set in stone. I need to appreciate the moments now, rather than anticipate the future that doesn’t exist yet.

The moment is now. Your life is now. We are all guilty of rushing. It is part of our nature. It is good to anticipate something in the future. It brings us hope, joy, and excitement, but our focus should be in the moment. Trying to make the best of what is right in front of us.

I no longer want to rush through the week. These are 5 precious days you can’t get back, so I will try to make the best out of these days. We all should make the best out of all our days. Remember your work days are longer, than non work days. Those are a lot of days to rush over. It will be the end of the year sooner than you know it.

Just try to relax, step back, and live as mindfully as you can. Enjoy the little moments. Make moments to enjoy. Try to find little joys within these days. Lets try patience and going through the motions. There will be bad times, dull times, exciting times. Some days suck more than others, and there are days we will like to rush over, that is understandable. You can use those days as a learning experience. Not everyday will be exciting, fun and full of happiness. We should try not to make a habit of rushing through everyday, because time flies faster than you know it. The only time you are truly living is in the moment.

Life Quotes // Inspirational // Live In The Moment | Moments | Moments  quotes, Realization quotes, Life quotes

Mental Health Boosters

Mental Health is very important. The focus on mental health should be as strong as physical health. I like to list some habits that encourage a healthier mindset. A healthier mind leads to more happiness, peace with yourself, others, and life. It cultivates self-growth and confidence.

We as individuals should always strive to improve our mental state for our well-being. For our ability to live life fully. Here are some habits/routines that can be beneficial to our mental well-being. Reminders and awareness of these habits can help us work towards improvement and mindful living.

  • Set goals-Writing a list of goals and checking them off is a great way to boost your confidence. The feeling of accomplishment and achievement is a great feeling. If you can do one thing, than you are much more confident to do another. Make sure the goals are specific and manageable. I always feel better when I accomplish a goal, like finishing a blog post. It improves my mood, and my perception of the day improves.
  • Get movement-Exercise releases endorphins, which helps elevate your mood. You may not be a fan of exercise, but at least 20 minutes of walking can be helpful. Get up, and get moving in anyway you possibly can, even if it is walking around for a bit. Our bodies need movement, and so does our minds.
  • Commute with nature-Spending just 5 minutes in nature can help improve your mood. Something about being outdoors in nature just lifts my spirits. It calms me, and rejuvenates me. It shows you the beauty of the world, and it gives you a sense of appreciation. It gives you the space to think, and be free. It can bring you back to reality, and what truly matters.
  • Get sleep-Our mind needs rest. Getting enough sleep gives you clarity, allows you to be more productive. It gives you the energy to go on with your day, and get what you need to get done. Less sleep creates exhaustion, unproductiveness and anxiety. It can lead to one feeling low and down. Sleep helps heal our body and our minds, so it is important to get as much as we can. Most see sleep as a luxury, but it isn’t, it is a necessity. We all know what our mental state can be with lack of sleep. We can’t think, or function like we normally do with a sleepy mind and body.
  • Create a mindful routine-You can do this in the morning, at night, and during the day. This is the time to step away from distractions and just be in the moment. I think it is great to do this before bed, and after you wake up. It can help relax you before bed, and it can help recharge you before you head out for the day. This is the time to step away from digital devices, and live in the moment. Distractions can cultivate feelings of anxiety, frustration, anger, sadness etc,. Stepping away from that for a bit can help alleviate those feelings, and allow us to be in a more calmer and happier place.
  • Try something new- We all have routines, but would it be more fun to do it in a different way? This can help spice up your day, and bring a bit of excitement to your day. It would make your day a little less mundane, and a bit more enjoyable.
  • Less reactive mentality-Try to go with the flow of life. Remind yourself that life doesn’t always go to plan, or life isn’t always smooth. We should make some breathing room for the unexpected, so when the unexpected happens. We are able to cope better. Traffic jams, accidents, flat tires, lost keys happen etc, in these moments, take deep breaths, and accept what is. This can allow for a calmer state of mind.
  • Connect with others-I always feel uplifted after meeting up with a good friend, or family member. We are social beings, so connecting with another individual is important for our well-being. Remember that quality, over quantity is important. Being able to communicate our true thoughts with another can be a wonderful experience.
  • Express yourself-Similar to the one above. There are other formats to express your thoughts and feelings as well. Journaling, writing(lyrics, stories, poems), drawing, composing, can all be forms to communicate your thoughts that can be therapeutic for oneself. Letting your thoughts out brings relief.
  • Drink water-Our brains are made of 75% water. Loss of hydration can have serious effects on your mood, concentration and cognitive functioning. Studies have shown that decreased water intake cultivates higher levels of anxiety, depression, anger, tension and fatigue.
  • Reduce sugar/processed food intake-Eating added sugars and processed foods is linked to higher rates of depression and anxiety. It is also known to deplete the B vitamins we need to sustain good moods. Try to add a bit more nutrient dense foods to your diet. Balance is key.
  • Gratitude-Counting your blessings is a great way to see life in a more positive light, and lift your mood. Focusing your energy on the things you do have, and the things you do enjoy is a great way to boost your mood, and put you in a happier place.

As you can see there are plenty of ways to help improve your mental health. I just wanted to bring a bit of awareness to some things that can help improve your overall well-being. Our mental health should be a priority. Mental instability is prevalent, and there should be more focus on improving our wellness. There should be lessons and classes on this for everyone. Awareness is key. Below are some visuals of mood boosters. I thought it would be a nice addition.

6 Instant Mood Boosters | Self care bullet journal, Self care activities,  Self improvement tips
Immunity Boosters: Nutrition and Health Facts - News, Yoga, Health, Fitness  and Mental Health www.Yogfit.in

Being Offended/Easily Triggered

Scrolling online, reading others opinions on controversial topics. Some have similar thoughts to myself, others are completely different. I could argue and say it is wrong, bigoted, ignorant, racist etc,. I could completely shut the opinion down. Get angry, upset, and call them names, but I just no longer want to be part of that narrative. When I hear or read , even ones that seem harsh. I recognize these people grew up in a different environment, and do not have the same knowledge of things that I do. Does it make their opinion right?, no, not really, but to allow myself to trap myself into negativity is something I choose not to do.

Insulting others isn’t going to make them understand your point of view. Arguing, getting upset, or frustrated isn’t going to change another person’s mind, so it is best not to have those emotions consume you. Take a step back, take a deep breath, and try to listen, and see their side. It may be difficult if they come across as rude and cruel. These type of engagements are ones you should ignore. They rarely solve anything, and it is hard to come to an understanding when people are insulting each other. Expressing your opinion in a diplomatic manner, listening to one another, even if your views are opposite is important for understanding and learning. If you don’t agree with someone, express your opinion in a compassionate manner. It is the others person’s choice to take it in, or not. You do your part, and allow them to their part, and leave it at that. Move on. The back and forth trying to prove a point can only get you so far.

I choose not to feed into the negativity. I think it is the best way to keep your sanity and peace of mind. I see and hear comments that sound harsh, cruel, and ignorant. I learned to just see and hear it, and move on. Not every individual thinks the same, or has the same views. We got to accept that, and realize nothing we can do about that. No need to waste our precious energy on arguing. Everyone has a right to their own opinion. I learned to respect all different opinions, as long as it doesn’t disrespect, or harm a group, or others.

Now when it comes to criticism about oneself, that can be tough. Our ego can’t cope with it, but we should learn for our peace of mind. Not everyone will like you. People can be cruel and harsh, but that is more of a reflection of them. If you truly know yourself, have confidence in yourself. Have self-love and acceptance. It will be much easier to deflect these comments about you.

A Youtube vlogger mentioned, if this person criticizing you is a respectable source, and it is something you can learn from, than take it in, and grow from it, if not, ignore the noise, and keep moving. No reason to get in a state of negativity for a person who you don’t know, and who doesn’t know you. It is better to focus your energy on things that spark positivity, and growth in your life. Focus on listening to people who have your best interest, and want to aide you growth.

I often find comments regarding mental health to be ignorant at times, but I also realize a lot of people don’t have knowledge on mental health issues, hence the ignorance. Once again, I try not to let the words of random strangers upset me. There are times people you know, or loved ones can say offensive things that can be triggering to you, but we got to recognize the differences of opinions and thought processes. They may say things about you that bug you. Their opinion about you is theirs. If you are happy and believe in yourself, than that should be enough. They should focus on themselves, rather than your life. If it is out of love and concern, than do listen, but if it is just noise, than ignore. I can’t change others opinions, maybe some through compassionate dialogue, but mostly no, because most of these thoughts and opinions have been indoctrinated since childhood, and that is hard to break.

We live in a political correct society. A place of safe spaces. I don’t really agree with it to be honest. Canceling someone for a mistake, or difference of opinion has gotten a bit too far. You can’t learn from pushing away opinions different from you. Challenging you viewpoints helps you grow as an individual. Instead of canceling, belittling, insulting, and arguing. You can learn to agree to disagree. There is absolutely no way every individual will have the same views.

Humans are flawed creature. I can’t expect everyone to be open-minded, enlightened, compassionate, and empathetic. It is not a matter of right or wrong. It is just how it is. Your energy should be on your self-growth, not everyone else’s. Learn to be satisfied with your views, and allow others to have their own. If they agree with you, that’s great, if not, great, lets learn.

I do believe words can be damaging as physical harm, but unlike physical harm. We have control with how much damage it can cause. Words are just words. We perceive them the way we want. A word can mean one thing to one person, and another to someone else. Words can offend one person, but not another. Words are subjective. You choose how you handle the words thrown at you. It is all about your perception, confidence, state of mind, mental strength, self- awareness, and self-acceptance. All these play a role in how hurtful or harmful the words will be to an individual.

Mindful Reminder Post(Worry)

Just a reminder that your struggles at the moment will pass. I had a day last week where I felt anxious and worried. The unpredictable experiences of life can get to us. Just remind yourself that it may suck, or be bad right now, but the worry and struggle will pass. Having this reminder helped me cope, and allowed me not to be as anxious as I used to be. Life is in constant motion. The feelings and experience at the moment will pass. You will get through this hiccup just like the many ones before. Our thoughts tend to exaggerate the situation. They tend to focus on the negative outcomes. Awareness of this can help us counter those thoughts in a more positive or realistic way. It may not flip our negative mindset entirely, but just a bit of awareness comes a long way.

Changing Cognitive Distortions

I discussed Cognitive Distortions a couple of posts ago in Cognitive Distortions. I like to take this post to list some techniques that can help you change those distorted views. Dr. Burns listed plenty of help techniques. I will discuss a couple here. I recommend buying the book to get the full scope of techniques. It is important to remove these distortions from permeating our lives, so that we can move towards healing and living more peacefully.

  • Positive Reframing– Putting your focus on the negative thoughts and difficult emotions one is feeling. Ask yourself these two questions: (1) What are the advantages, or benefits to these type of emotions and thoughts? (2) What do these thoughts and emotions tell me about myself and my values that is wonderful?

Feelings of anxiety can show that an upcoming event is meaningful to you, or that you are doing something outside your comfort zone, which can be something beneficial to you in the long run. Looking at these emotions is a different light can help alleviate the negativity associated with these difficult emotions. You may start to feel better about an upsetting situation.

  • Straightforward Technique-This one is pretty straightforward as the name states, but as straightforward as it is, this can be difficult for most to do. Try to switch your perspective to a more positive, or realistic approach, rather than negative.

Ask yourself questions, Is this negative thought really true? Do I truly believe it? Is there another way to look at it? I absolutely love this technique, and use it all the time. Switching your perspective can make such a difference to your state of mind.

  • Double Standard Technique-Rather than putting yourself down. Try talking to yourself in a way you would talk to a good friend you care about.

It is so much easier to be cruel to ourselves, and lift other up when they are down, but we should learn to show the same kindness to ourselves. When you say negative things to yourself, remind yourself if this is something you would say to a friend who is going through the same thing, or who would say those negative things about themselves.

  • Examine the Evidence-Rather than looking at things in a negative light. Try to look into the facts of what you are saying.

Is what you are saying really true? What are the facts? What does it show? Telling yourself you are a failure. Look up the definition, does that truly describe you. In most cases this would not be the case.

  • Socratic Method-This is when you take a deeper look into what you are saying, and analyze if it is true or not.

If you think you are a failure, or a awful person, or suck at life. Look into what those words really mean. Do you truly fail all the time to be a failure, or have you had some achievements? Are you really awful?, or did you make a mistake, or make one bad decision out of all the great things you do? Does life truly suck, or are you having one bad moment? Is that really relative to you, or is this something that happens to everyone? This method allows you to look into what you are saying, and find insight to the truth of the matter. It showcases our faulty thought patterns.

  • Thinking in Shades of Gray-We usually face problems, because we tend to see things in black and white, but things in life aren’t normally that way.

There are good and bad things about oneself and life. Experiences in life aren’t always great or bad. You are not perfect, and one mistake doesn’t make you a horrible human being. Learning to look at both sides is important.

  • Semantic Method-This method is about looking at the language you use to define life experiences. Instead of saying, “I shouldn’t have made this mistake this,” you can say, “It would have been better if I have not made that mistake.” Instead of saying, I can’t do this, it is too hard” try saying, “It will be hard to do this, but I can try my best. Instead of saying, “I hate how I look,” try saying “I don’t look my best today.” Instead of thinking, “I hate my life,” try thinking, “this moment sucks, but it will pass.”

Finding better wording can allow one space to practice self-kindness and compassion. It is all in how you word things. Wording things in a more compassionate, and positive way can help you move through difficult situations much more smoothly.

  • Let’s Define Terms-This method allows you to actually look at the definition you are labeling yourself.

When you label yourself a loser, failure, foolish, ugly, horrible etc,. Once you look up the actual term for these things. You realize that doesn’t define you. When you actually look up these definitions. You realize how absurd it is to define oneself in those ways.

  • Be Specific-It is important to focus on the specific situation, problem, mistake flaw etc,. It is easy to globalize our problems, mistakes, flaws to other areas. It is just one bad day, one flaw, one mistake. There are plenty of good days, things to appreciate, and strengths to yourself and your life.
  • Self-Monitoring-This method is about keeping tracking of all your negative thoughts, either writing them down when you have them, or put the number of how many negative thoughts came to mind on a watch or phone. This can make you aware of how often you have negative thoughts. Having this awareness cultivates a diminishing of the negative thoughts.

I really like the self-monitoring technique. Awareness is very important to self-improvement and recovery. Having a visual really can open our eyes, and allow us to make changes.

I believe all these techniques above can be beneficial to changing our distorted ways of thinking. It can help cultivate a healthier mindset, and peace of mind. There are plenty more techniques in the book, but wanted to limit it to the ones I liked the best. I recommend the book if you like to know more, but I think these techniques suffice. It is important to be aware of our faulty thought patterns, so we can figure out ways to cope and manage them, so that our lives can be more fulfilled.

Mindful Morning Routine(Plant Care)

My favorite time of the week is my Saturday mornings.This is when I do my plant maintenance. I enjoy taking each plant, water it if it needs it, cleaning, and inspecting them. This time allows me to be mindful, and appreciate the beauty of nature. I don’t have many plants, so it is easy to spend an hour just being present with my plants.

This time is very therapeutic and relaxing. I have just become a plant owner last year, and my skills have improved immensely. It is all about experience, and persistence. I didn’t want to give up, after killing plenty. It is all about learning and growing. I am proud of my improvements.

I really enjoy the scenery and calmness my plants provide. I hope to get more in the future. They provide me much joy, and allow me to be in the moment. Spending an hour tending to my plants really helps start my weekend right. It puts me in a better mood and brings joy, peace, happiness, and fulfillment to my life.

I am writing this, because I like to express the importance of a wonderful mindful morning routine. Whatever you can find that can help bring you to a mindful state as your day starts can be beneficial to how your day goes. How your day starts sets the mood for the rest of the day. It helps put you in better mindset. It gives you the energy you need to go on with your day, and face whatever comes your way. You must first give to yourself, before you can give to others, so it is important to spend the beginning of your day being mindful.I hope you all have a lovely mindful morning. I will post some pictures of my plant babies below.

Self-Care Reminder Post(Lazy Day)

There will be days when you lack the will to be productive, and just want to do nothing. Today was that day for me. My allergies got the best of me this morning, which made me just want to sleep. My mind couldn’t get in a creative flow, and my body was weak. These were signs that I needed to chill and relax today. I felt a bit guilty that I couldn’t write, but quickly recognized that a day of doing nothing is necessary from time to time. Your mind and body need time to recharge from time to time.

Being busy and productive isn’t necessary all the time. The hustle culture is great, but we need space to chill from time to time. If you are not feeling it, and I definitely wasn’t today, than you shouldn’t force yourself to do something. If it is constant, than I get it, you got to get moving, but every once in awhile, you got to give yourself the space to chill. There will be some guilt, but your mind and body will appreciate the day off, and it can help rejuvenate oneself for the next day. In the long run it can be beneficial. Be kind to yourself, and allow yourself a day to do nothing if your mind and body tell you to. I truly appreciated this chill day, and in the end I did find something to write about. Now let me get back to watching some Kpop videos haha

Pros and Cons of Complaining

I wanted to write this post, because I recently decided I didn’t want to partake in complaining anymore. I don’t believe it is useful to me, and it permeates negativity. Now there can be some benefits to complaining, which involves venting. There is nothing wrong with expressing our troubles from time to time as long as it is not habitual. I read an article on complaining titled Hidden Benefits and Pitfalls of Complaining (verywellmind). I thought it would be helpful to discuss these benefits and pitfalls.

Pros

Venting is Necessary

Bottling in your thoughts and emotions can take a toll on a person. Sometimes it is necessary to let things out. It can give you relief. It can help you feel heard. When I get to a point when I have to let it out. I always feel much better. It can relieve stress. Letting it all out can finally help you get some answers as well. It can be from the help of the person you are venting to, or maybe now that you found relief. You can move on to figuring out what can be done to help you.

It Provides Validation

Knowing that someone gets it, and that you are not alone can be helpful. Having someone sympathize with you, or agree with you showcases that you have a right to feel and think the way you do, and that something isn’t wrong with you. Complaining to others gives us that validation we need to move forward.

Now this pro can also be a con as well. If you talk to the wrong person who validates complaints that put you in the wrong, or they agree with a distorted point of view. That type of validation can be harmful.

Getting Another Perspective

By complaining to others you may be able to gain some other perspectives on the situation. When we complain, we tend to focus on our perspective, we may see things in black and white terms, or blow the situation out of proportion. Talking to another person may help you see that your perspective may not align with reality. This can help give you new insight to the situation. You may realize things are not as bad as you think, or you shouldn’t really be as angry or upset as you feel.

Finding Solutions

It can be easier finding solutions when you have more people involved. Complaining to others may make it easier for you to find a solution. It can help open you up to others input, and possible solutions you didn’t think of.

Complaining Leads to Action

Sometimes it is important to complain to the right people who can help make changes. I once complained to my bosses about a situation at work. They heard it, and fixed it, problem solved. Sometimes it is that easy. Complaints that are work related, or any situation that is outside your control. It is best to complain to people who can help you. I had coworkers complain to me about work related stuff that can probably be solved by talking to a supervisor or lead. I can’t help them with these problems, so it is useless complaining to me. This is why it is important to complain to the right people. If you do, then things can get done to make things better for you.

Cons

Focusing on the Problem, Not the Solutions

This is a big one when it comes to cons of complaining. Putting your attention on the problem will leave you stuck, feeling hopeless, depressed, angry, and frustrated. You will never be satisfied, and your perspective will only focus on the negative. This type of mindset when it comes to complaining can cultivate misery for an individual.

Pessimism

Constant complaining can lead to a pessimistic outlook. Being a habitual complainer cultivates negativity.

Negative Groups

Misery loves company. Complaining can be contagious. Complainers may gravitate towards others who complain. A complainer may get you going, and get you to complain as well. It may start out as validating each other, but end up turning into an angry mob, or a negativity circle of friends.

Drain on Others

Constant complaining can definitely be a drain on others, and bring others down. People have their own problems. They don’t want to be dragged down by someone else’s problems. We should try to build and lift others up, not bring them down. Constant complaining can push others away from you, leaving you with no support system to help.

I will say this if complaining leaves you feeling worse, gets nothing done, and it is constantly about the same topic. This type of complaining is toxic. It serves no purpose, but to drain you of life, happiness, and peace of mind. Complaining has its good moments from time to time. When you need someone to listen. When there is a solution on the horizon. When you had enough, and need to voice your thoughts.

I am not against complaining if it can help you, or myself in any way. I will only complain if it benefits me, if it doesn’t, I will let it be, and keep moving forward. Sometimes things in life sucks, sometimes things don’t go your way, sometimes people disappoint, that is life. There is no need to wallow in negativity about it. Tell yourself, things may suck now, but there will be plenty of things to brighten your life as well. Life has its good and bad moments. You got to deal with the bad ones, to appreciate and enjoy the good moments.

Source:https://www.verywellmind.com/complaining-why-do-we-do-it-3144857

There Is Always a Story(Judging Others)

We all judge and criticize others. This person is annoying, problematic, crazy, angry, a spoiled brat, entitled, an idiot. But claims like these only touch the surface. We must remember that actions and behaviors of others always has a story behind it. We don’t have to excuse all these behaviors, but we can learn to understand. Empathy and compassion come a long way. Just because someone is outside the “normal,” does not mean they should be disregarded. It may be easy to see things through the perspective glasses of our own, but it doesn’t mean that it is the correct action to take.

Mindful Break Time(Mindfulness Reminder)

I needed a break from the information overload I was getting online. I found this lovely passage in my mi dullness book. I appreciate the awareness I have from mindfulness practice to take mental breaks and be mindful.

It does a great job of clearing my mind, and helps rejuvenate my spirit. I absolutely can’t wait for the nicer weather to be able to enjoy the freshness of the outdoors, and beauty of the natural scenery.

Mindfulness is a wonderful thing. It opens you up to opportunities, new adventures, shifts in thoughts and behavior, and creative power. I now feel refreshed and ready to start my shift.

I think it is important to be aware of when to take breaks. Your mind can only withstand so much. A break may be all you need, even if it is 5 minutes. Sit, take a walk, stretch, write etc,. Mindfulness practice isn’t a quick fix, but it can improve your well-being over time with continuous practice.